


The Patron Saint of Deals & Devils

by TheRainArtist



Category: Saints Row
Genre: Deal with a Devil, Drug Use, F/M, Headcanon, Other, Swearing, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-25
Updated: 2015-04-12
Packaged: 2018-03-19 14:35:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 24,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3613599
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheRainArtist/pseuds/TheRainArtist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Since the Saints began their takeover of Steelport, Shaundi couldn't help but notice that while things were going smoothly, there was still something amiss. Maybe the Boss's blue skin and suspicious phone app called "Upgrade" have something to do with it? Future M!Boss/Shaundi, takes place between SR3 and SR4.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Deal on the Docks

**Author's Note:**

> Author's Note: I always thought it was strange that in Saints Row the Third, your character could not only gain superhuman-esque skills, but have outlandish skin and eye colors and not one character said anything about it being weird. Long story short, I decided to make a little fic about some silly headcanons I have about The Boss and why they keep giving cash to some shady app that gives them godly powers on their smartphone. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ I'll probably make several parts to this piece and probably most definitely a bonus M!Boss/Shaundi ending with a side of sauce, but for now who knows~   
> I also posted this same series on fanfiction.net, but I've heard very good things about Archive of Our Own so I wanted to test the waters here and give this place a go as well. 
> 
> Please enjoy!

            She just didn't _get_ it.

            Furrowing her manicured brows and rhythmically cleaning the gun in her hand, she watched as Pierce and Oleg's chess pieces slid across the board. There was classical song playing softly in the background and the two players exchanged snickers and taunts as they played, but Shaundi kept silent, apparently the only one getting crushed by the elephant in the room.

 

            Steelport was turning out to be an excellent home, and with the Saints' having most all the districts by the balls and barely a rival gang member dumb enough to walk the streets anymore, it should have been dandy. But there was something pretty damn _obvious_ that was a change from their old city, but nobody bothered to talk about it. Shaundi just knew they had to have noticed - after all, it wasn't the scenery change that was of the biggest concern to her.

            "So have you both just _not_ noticed our boss's skin is blue since we've gotten here, or-"

            "Is it not just a medical condition?" Oleg interjected without bothering to look up from the match, moving another piece while Pierce protectively moved the chess board nearer to him and the Russian at Shaundi's tone.

            "Since when did medical conditions make you _blue_? You didn't think he was just one of the Syndicate's weird reject experiments did you?" she retorted.

            "I didn't," the burly man replied easily, "but I wasn't exactly going to be looking a gift horse that was liberating me from the Syndicate in his periwinkle mouth, either. I feel as though if the Boss wished us to know about his skin condition, he would've told us."

            "A guy who doesn't like being called by anything but nicknames, telling us about how he suddenly gained blue skin. Yeah, I somehow doubt it."

            "Damn Shaundi, chill," Pierce finally piped up, knocking one of Oleg's pieces off and picking it up to waggle at her, "you don't know the Boss's name and you're still okay with it, plus you never asked about his weird purple hair before, so why care about his weird-ass skin secrets?"

            "Don't _you_ tell me to chill when I know _you_ knew he wasn't that color before coming to Steelport," Shaundi snapped back, her intense scowl averted as Pierce looked back down at the chess board, "c'mon, you're telling me you also didn't notice he's gone from tan to blue but he hasn't told you shit about it?"

And she _so_ knew the Boss's name! It was... it was... well, she was sure she had read it before on a medical or prison file of his before. It'd come back to her eventually. Pierce did have a bit of a point about the hair, though: she always figured he just dyed it that iridescent black-purple considering the Saints's colors, though she never saw any packages of hair dye around and she couldn't imagine that anyone sold purple beard  dye despite the fact his executive cut-groomed beard was that color since he woke up from his coma in Stilwater.

 

            "It's not like I didn't _ask_ ," Pierce finally admitted, setting down Oleg's captured piece and looking from the board to Shaundi. A frown tugged at his face, and he seemed too bothered to even try to call Oleg out for casually moving the table around, "and I noticed, a'ight? The Boss just hasn't said jack shit about it other than some bullshit about a spray tan gone wrong, then just tellin' me to fuck off when I called him out on it."

            "If you are so concerned, why don't you go ask him yourself," Oleg asked curiously, gesturing out to the helipad as Pierce scowled at the chess board, "he told us he was going out near that old nuclear plant we took over a few weeks back to take care of some additional business, I'm sure if you wanted to go find him and told him you wanted to have a heart-to-heart, then he would listen."

            "The Boss isn't exactly a 'heart-to-heart' sorta guy, Oleg," Shaundi replied dryly, popping all the cleaned pieces of her handgun back into place as she spoke, "besides, if he wouldn't say anything to Pierce, then why would he tell me?"

            "Well you've got two reasons more than I have," Pierce teased, though his mischievous smile was met with Shaundi crossing her arms over her chest and a pointed glare, "for real though, he never seems to get pissed with you the way he gets pissed at other people, especially since you got rid of the dreads and cleaned yourself up. I think our big Russian friend has a point here, Shaund - the most the Boss'd do is tell you to stop asking."

            "Right," Shaundi agreed with some hesitation, picking up her gun off the table and tucking it into the holster at her side, "though..." She trailed off, and stared out the large windows of their lavishly decorated penthouse. Well, if you want a job done right, she supposed...

            "If I get my ass handed to me Pierce, you're going to pay for it out _yours_ , got it?" Moving off the couch, Shaundi headed to the elevator doors, punching the button for the lift down to the garage.

            "Yeah yeah, good luck." Pierce bid her farewell with a snort of a laugh, turning back to the chess board as Shaundi rolled her eyes and stepped into the elevator. Oleg waved farewell to her retreating figure and soon turned back to the game at hand, and stared at the board with Pierce silently for a solid minute.

            "... You know, it, uh, it ain't bad outside and there's still some daylight. You wanna go play in the park?"

            "After you, comrade."

\-----  
  


            Not for the first time, the Boss wasn't answering his phone, though with a particular goal in mind other than dicking around this time, it was mildly pissing Shaundi off. Just what the hell was he up to? She decided to cruise around town, keeping an eye out for her boss, eyes peeled for any sign of his usually destructive trail down any of the seedy streets of Steelport. No sign of him in the nearby Friendly Fire, Zimos said he hadn't run off to any of the strip joints or with any of his hookers, and the radio ads for Professor Genki's Super Ethical Reality Climax lacked any mention of the Boss joining them for an episode tonight. Sighing, Shaundi stopped at a red light and pouted down at her phone, pressing the dial button once again on her phone. Putting her phone to her ear, she strummed her nails on her steering wheel, watching as a few cars sped along... only to be smashed out of the way by the driver of a purple Bootlegger and the three police cars hot on his tail.

 

            "Oh _fuck_ me." Shaundi groaned under her breath. Jamming her phone into her pocket, she slammed her foot on the gas and cut the wheel, making a hard right turn to catch up with the cops and her bastard boss. Of course. Of _course_ the one time on the _one_ day she wanted to maybe tread into dangerously personal waters with the Boss, and he has gotten himself into a police chase. Slamming her hand on the car horn to get both the Boss's and the police's attention, she quickly removed it to whip out her pistol.

            Sorely wishing she had brought more than a pair of .45 Shepherds and an assault rifle in the backseat, Shaundi stuck her arm out the window, firing at the squad car closest to her until she hit both back tires. Maneuvering in front of the car as it veered and dragged itself along to a stop at the side of the road, she fired at the second one while the Boss screeched his own car to a halt, twisting it so the car nearest him would crash into the side of his vehicle. Leaping out of the car just seconds before the collision and tumbling a little less than gracefully against the pavement, the Boss scrambled up and opened fire onto the police still shooting at him and Shaundi.

            Shooting another one of the three officers left standing in the knee, Shaundi grabbed all her guns and bolted over to the Boss as the blue-skinned man dove into one of the Peacemakers that still had the lights on, the brunette throwing herself into the passenger's seat as the Boss floored it.

            "Fancy meeting you here, love." The Boss commented over the squeal of the wheels and the roar of the engine as he took off, mowing down a man in a Saints Flow  suit as he drove the car onto the sidewalk, cutting every corner he could to get the sirens behind them to fade faster.

            "Don't you 'love' me, jackass," Shaundi snapped back, clinging to the car as she was jerked around by the sudden turns and acceleration. Rolling down the squad cars' windows, she contorted her lithe body half-outside the window and looked around for any more of the boys in blue still tailing them, firing a few shots at the one car still following them by a particularly stubborn bleeding cop, "what the hell'd you do this time? Don't tell me you were car bowling with those protestors _again_."

            "Then I won't." The Boss gave her a grin that walked the fine line between sheepish and cocky, and she scoffed at it. For a guy who would get more pissed off than terrified of someone putting a gun to his head, this was the third time in two weeks he'd been smashing his car into the protestors that picketed spots around town near their cribs.

            "Least you could do is make sure there aren't any cops around before you go running people over," Shaundi said, giving the street they turned into a good look around before sliding into the passenger's seat. Putting the safety back on her gun and shoving it back into her holster, she gave another tired sigh and leaned against the seat. She was silent for a moment, before adding as the Boss started toying with the radio, "just what the hell do those protestors keep doing to piss you off, anyhow? I doubt any of the shit they say is either untrue or about your grandma."

            "Considering my family, I'm pretty sure anything they'd come up with about my grandmum may be true," the Boss gave a snicker as he spoke, stopping on The Mix -  Bonnie Tyler was playing, and Shaundi reached over to bat the Boss's hand away when he tried to crank the volume, "and it isn't like _all_ of 'em make me want to. It's mainly the ones that make signs about you that make me want to give 'em a bit of a tap with my ride."

            "The ones about me?" Shaundi vaguely recalled seeing them: most just said she was a whore, though considering that was far from the _worst_ thing she'd been called both here and back at Stilwater, she had barely batted a lash at them considering she usually had better shit to do than murder pedestrians.

            "Well, not _just_ you, but," the Boss gave her a blue-lipped frown, and then blinked in sudden realization. Checking his phone, he hissed down at the time, "oh, _shit_. Hang on, Shaund."

            "What is it?" Giving a soft 'oomph' as what was once a daresay average car speed accelerated at the drop of a hat, Shaundi's hand immediately went back for her pistol but the Boss waved her off, gold eyes focused on the road up ahead.

            "Got some business to attend to, I got distracted with those fucking cops s'all." Heading straight towards the docks out near Kinzie's place, he turned on the car's headlights as the sun crept further down past the horizon.

            "Call up the crib and ask for a car and get back to your place, I got this."

            "What, and leave you to get distracted defending my honor again?" Shaundi teased. Though she'd never admit she found it strangely... endearing that the Boss would kill someone who insulted her (not that he usually needed much reason to get his hands dirty), she too was here on business, and she wasn't going to let the Boss slip out of her grip that easily. The Boss gave another snort of a laugh as he parked the car up against the curb.

            "Very funny, but I mean it. I got this, get going."

            "And I meant it, too," Shaundi replied, "it's fine, I'll come with. I got nothing better to do tonight anyways." Well, she did have _one_ thing to do, though the fact the Boss was acting like he was in the hot seat over something as simple as getting backup was weird. He was scowling at her stubbornly - when he could hold her gaze. He was mainly altering between looking from her, to his phone, to the docks where the wood creaked against the waves.

            "Shaundi," his voice was low, the playfulness in his tone dying as seriousness took over, "leave."

            "No," she shot back defiantly, "unless you're going to be making some 'business deals' with some of Zimos's hos at those docks, I'm coming with you."

            "I wouldn't come out here to d- fuck it, Shaundi, it doesn't _matter_. C'mon, I just want to get this done."

            Shaundi scowled at him, and forced the blue skinned man to hold her pissed stare, his golden eyes clashing with her rich brown ones as neither backed down.

            "Even if we _both_ know that I could hold myself up against whatever the hell you're going to play hero dealing with, _fine_. You gotta tell me something before I go, though."

            " _Fine_ , what?" The Boss spat.

Mentally crushing the sudden feeling of awkwardness as she had not expected him to agree so easily, Shaundi bit the bullet and spoke, giving a small hand gesture to the gang leader's muscular figure.

            "Look, I'm sure I'm not the only one of the gang that's noticed, but... you've changed since Stilwater, Boss. Not just in personality, but in regards to... to... Boss, why the _hell_ is your skin blue?" The boss blinked, taken aback by her question. Tilting his head to the side like a confused bird, he looked down from his icy blue hands back to Shaundi.

            "The fuck's it matter to you, Shaund?" The Boss asked defensively, his British accent thickening as he gently clenched his fists. Well, if Shaundi had any lack of suspicion that this was more than meets the eye, she knew she was probably right.

            "I don't know, maybe because people just don't up and turn that color overnight?"

            "I'm fine if you think it's some sorta medical condition, Shaund-"

            "If it's not a medical condition then what _is_ it?"

            "It doesn't bloody matter, just go home, I want to close in on my damn deal already-"

            "Not until you tell me what the hell is wrong with you."

            "Fine, it's... uh, paint."

            "It's _paint_."

            "Yeah."

Shaundi gave the Boss a deadpan stare before grabbing his wrist, tugging it closer when he instinctively jerked his arm away.

            "Bloody hell Shaund, what are you- _"_ watching as Shaundi licked her thumb, the lieutenant rubbed it against his wrist. Nothing happened other than the Boss making a face at the feel of her spit drying on him and Shaundi giving him a flat glare.

            "Paint, huh." She said. The gang leader frowned at her and sheepishly tugged his arm away, rubbing where she tried to wash away his skin.

            "It's waterproof," the Boss lied. Shaundi gave him an irritated sigh and kept her stare locked on his. Finally, the Boss slumped his shoulders, and leaned back against the seat of the car, closing his eyes, "... okay. I give." Watching as he checked his phone again, he tapped the app for his bank account, and the two silently watched as several grand wired itself into his system.

            "Okay?" Shaundi asked with a hint of wariness.

            "Yeah, _okay_ ," the Boss sounded defeated and pissed - a deadly, but foreign combo if she ever heard one - and started to get out of the car, "you might as well come along if you're so damn curious, but I swear to God if any of the others find out there'll be Hell t'pay."  
  


\-----   
  


            The salty air tickled against Shaundi's midriff, and she was surprised the Boss hadn't brought much to wear out in this brisk weather other than a black leather jacket (unzipped just enough to show off the burst of bright golden and orange ink of the monarch butterflies fluttering up his chest - something that could be _surprisingly_ distracting when both trying to fight or talk with him), black boots, and a pair of those battalion pants she'd seen a few of those STAG fuckers wearing before but in Saints purple with black straps. He must've noticed her grimacing at the cold the further out on the docks they walked, considering he nudged her with a cocky smirk.

            "Didn't know you found business meetings so exciting." he taunted.

            "Fuck off," Shaundi spat back, crossing her arms over herself self-consciously, "who're we meeting out here, anyways?"

            " _I'm_ meeting an old business partner of mine," the Boss retorted, unzipping his jacket all the way as he spoke, " _you_ are going to keep quiet. I don't usually have anyone around when I do these deals, and I don't exactly know how my guy is going to deal with it."

            "What, he like you all to himself?" she teased back, though she quickly changed tones as the blue skinned man stopped walking to try and shirk off his jacket.

            "Keep your clothes on, Boss."

            "Not for nothing love, but having tits so hard they could cut diamond isn't very professional."

            "Well neither is going shirtless!" Shaundi responded, causing the Boss to laugh as he tossed his jacket at her, revealing the low-cut tank top he wore underneath as well as several other tattoos: a Saints shield taking up his entire right arm, "SAINTS" with their logo taking up part of his left upper arm while a pair of purple serpents wrapped around the forearm.

            "Nice to know you think I go commando doing business." He taunted, grinning even more when Shaundi smiled despite herself, flipping him the bird as she caught his jacket and pulled it on. Even if he _was_ still pissed she was coming along - and though he'd never admit it, _uneasy_ about it - he could never stay furious at her the way he could at others.

Heading to the farthest end of the dock, the Boss stopped near a large set of shipping crates, digging around his pockets for his phone as Shaundi looked around. There was no sight of cops, or rival gangs, or... anyone else, really. The dirty ocean water lapped against the docks, and a boat chugged along several miles away.

            "You sure your guy's here, Boss?"

            "Positive," the Boss said, gesturing for her to come closer, "and I said keep it down, Shaundi." Heading closer to him, Shaundi looked down as he pulled up his phone screen and tapped an app she wasn't sure she'd ever seen him checking before: it was just a picture of a white arrow with a purple circle around it, titled "Upgrades". Upgrades? She didn't exactly take the Boss as a gamer, what could that-

            "Health or damage?"

            " _What?_ " Shaundi asked, confused. The Boss rolled his eyes, and gestured down at his phone to the list of options: two, she noticed, were listed simply as "Health" and "Damage".

            "I got enough cash for one upgrade, which should I pick?"

            "Health or dam- in reference to what?"

            "Just pick, Shaund."

            "Health," Shaundi said after a moment's hesitation, "but Boss, I don't get what that has to do with-"

With just two taps, the Boss brought up another screen with a list of different terms: "Health - Regen" and "Health Upgrade", all of which having numbers next to them, and a few with checkmarks in the boxes beside them. Tapping on "Health - Regen 4", he gave Shaundi a quick grin.

            "I was thinking this one too, I skipped it a little while back to bump up my stamina."

            "Boss, what the _hell_ -"

With a tap, the Boss accepted the purchase on the screen, and Shaundi watched as 42,500 dollars disappeared from the gang leader's account in just seconds.

            _"Thank you for your purchase,"_ an androgynous voice purred out from the boxes, causing Shaundi to give a slight jump in surprise and grip at her pistols, _"I have also included a_ reward _of sorts for you - should this do as advertised, consider it on the house."_ With that, the voice that echoed from within one of the metal crates died out, the crackling of static taking over.

            "Well that went better than I thought," The Boss commented, putting his phone into his pocket and heading over to the sound, "didn't even need to introduce you. As long as they get their cash though, eh?"

            "' _Should_ ' it do as advertised?" Shaundi questioned, following the Boss into one of the shipping crates, looking with some surprise at the sight of just a walkie-talkie standing next to a small cardboard box.

            "Well, you said you wanted to know where I got the blue skin from..." the Boss picked up the box and opened it up, taking out the two bizarre syringes one at a time to inspect what was written on the sides before choosing one filled with what appeared to be a gelatinous lavender concoction.

            "Boss, what the _fuck,"_ Shaundi spat out, trying to snatch his box out of his hand and scowling when he stepped away, "what is that? Don't tell me you're seriously going to do what I think you're going to fucking do."

            "It's _good shit_ is what it is," the leader spat back, and before Shaundi could make another grab at the box, the Boss tugged up his shirt and sank the needle right into one of the inked stars that curved from the bottom left of his stomach down past his hip. Shaundi made to move forward again, but the Boss stepped back again, taking the second syringe out of the box and gesturing for her to wait with it in-hand, he added, "hold on a sec, Shaund. Just trust me, will ya?"

            "Boss you're injecting who-knows-what into your gut and you want me to 'just trust you'," Shaundi hissed, "this isn't even- that looks like some hardcore shit. Like loa dust meets meth or something."

            "I'm not some exotic drug junkie if that's what you're suggesting," gold eyes glared at her harshly, but the edge soon faded as she stared back at him looking both pissed and daresay a little hurt, "just... c'mere, get closer."

Slowly pulling the needle from his skin once he injected all of the serum into his body, he purposefully gently scratched himself, connecting two of the stars with a red line. Hesitantly approaching the Boss, she inched closer and watched with disbelief as the tiny wound rapidly healed itself up, soon the only sign of anything left from the wound the small droplets of drying blood left. _Oh,_ she thought, _oh my God._

            "Jesus fucking Christ," Shaundi said under her breath, "Boss, seriously, what _was_ that?"

            "I told ya, it's good shit," he replied, giving her a grin as he inspected the unused syringe still in hand, squinting to read the silver print on the glass against the oily red-and-black mixture within, "'Vampire: suck the blood out of your human shield to regain health.' Shit, I bet that Miller brat might actually grow the stones to kill a man in the real world for this one, eh?"

            "Yeah, I get it, but I mean what's - what's _in_ it? And are you sure you should be sticking yourself with that one with what your 'guy' said about it?"

            "Nothing they've given me so far's killed me, Shaund," his smile wavered guiltily as she stared up at him with a surprised, accusing gaze, "whatever this one'll do to me can't be worse than purple hair and blue skin." If that was his idea of a joke to make her unwind, it was backfiring spectacularly.

            "How..." Shaundi trailed off, watching as the Boss pricked his skin with the needle - reaching out a hand instinctively, but holding back and letting her hand stay awkwardly in midair before letting it fall to her side. The further the gunk inside sank into the Boss, _her_ boss, the more rattled she felt. The guy she thought she could trust her life with and was one of the closest things to a friend she had in this shitty world especially after what happened with Johnny, was different. And sure, they all were, especially after Johnny and being stuck in this shithole of a town for months, but she never _realized_... "you... you said purple hair was a side effect. Christ, Boss, how long have you been doing this?"

            "Oh, that doesn't matter," the Boss waved off her question easily, pulling out the needle when the injection was complete, "as long as it does its job."

            "Boss, you can't just tell me that sorta shit after showing me you're- you're injecting yourself with some crap you probably couldn't name _five_ ingredients from to get _powers_ -" She was confused, daresay a bit scared, and _so pissed_. None of this stopped her from instinctively grabbing for the Boss-man as he buckled over, gripping at the stars where he stabbed himself with the needles, a nasty bruise forming near the injection site. "- _shit_ Boss, what'd you do to yourself? You all right?"

            "Feels like I'm happy I let you come with," he replied, kicking the dropped box towards her as he dropped his arm around her shoulders like a sack of potatoes, "hey, grab the box, I gotta toss these needles."

            Maneuvering herself so she could scoop up the cardboard box and the previously used Health Regen needle, she put the strange syringe in the box and moved herself so she was still holding the Boss's arm over her shoulders, offering him the box to plop the Vampire needle in as well.

            "Let's get you the hell away from this place," Shaundi grunted, shouldering more of her boss's weight as she helped him stagger out of the shipping crate, "c'mon, I'm taking your dumb ass to the hospital. I'll call Pierce once we get to the car and-"

            " _Do not tell Pierce_ ," the Boss hissed angrily through gritting teeth at his lieutenant, "you gave your word you wouldn't squeal. We gotta get rid of those needles first."

            "Yeah, that was before I knew what the hell you were doing!" Staggering to careen her towards the sea, Shaundi fumbled but followed his footsteps, dropping the box but quickly picking it up with a mumbled apology. With all her might, she chucked that damn little box out, but got little satisfaction watching it get swallowed up almost simultaneously by the dark waves. The two of them watched the waves for a drawn out minute, the Boss's breathing steadying to match the beating of the waves against the dock. Shaundi could feel his ribcage moving, and could smell the oceanic air mingle with the Boss's scent of leather, gunpowder, and some overpriced cologne that smelled like a pine log fire.

            "You okay?" Shaundi asked after the Boss's breathing slowed and he leaned on her less for support and more for... something. Shaundi really wasn't in any shape to be doing much psychoanalyzing at the moment.

            "Yeah, I'm good."

            "You scare the shit outta me sometimes, you know that?"

            "I sort of figured that, yeah."

The Boss gave a weak laugh as he felt her elbow dig at his ribcage, and he pulled her into an embrace with the arm he already had around her shoulders, holding her in it before letting go and dusting himself off.

            "My teeth hurt like a bitch, though. Hopefully that'll go away soon as I sure as hell don't plan on visiting a dentist anytime soon."

            "Let me see," Shaundi instructed, and the Boss obeyed, baring his teeth for her to lean in closer to his mouth and inspect. The brunette bit back a grimace by biting her lower lip, looking at the still-bleeding gums of her boss's teeth, his canines now notably sharper and a tad longer. Shaundi gave a soft 'tch' and asked, "your pulse still going, Boss? 'Cause you definitely got some vampire teeth."

            "Really?" the Boss sounded a bit more excited than he probably should have been if Shaundi's stare was any clue, but he didn't seem to notice at the moment. He hurriedly checked his neck for his pulse, then stuck his fingers into his mouth, feeling around and tapping at his new fangs experimentally.

            "Nah, still breathing, but bloody Hell! Getting rid of those Syndicate bastards'll be a lot more fun scaring 'em shitless with these new babies!"

            "Getting rid of-" Okay, she had to admit the idea of seeing those spineless bastards pissing themselves over the Boss tearing out one of their guys' throats with just his teeth was as satisfying as it was gross. Still, she inquired, "is that why you've been putting that junk into your system?"

            "Well, that's just the biggest bonus for doing it at the moment other than getting to have a shit-ton of superpowers." the Boss replied, though he had the sinking feeling Shaundi knew damn well he was avoiding the real answer.

            "You've been doing this before we got to Steelport though, haven't you Boss?"

            "I plead the fifth."

            " _You_ of all people are not allowed to try and hide under the law for protection." Shaundi scoffed, and the Boss gave her a stubborn snort before starting to head back, taking out his phone and hitting the Vehicle Delivery button.

            "Look, Shaundi," the Boss finally said as the phone rang, "you wanted to know about my blue skin, yeah? Now you know: not a medical condition, just... side effects."

            "And how many more of these side effects do you think you'll be able to take?"

The Boss gave her a long, hard stare. Someone picked up on the other line.

            "Yeah, I need a ride down by the docks," looking around at the glittering lights of the sleazy city before them, he tilted his head thoughtfully, and ran his tongue over his new fangs. "I think I'll just take the Torch. Yeah, see you in five." The Boss hung up and looked back at Shaundi, sighing at her heavily as he put his phone away again once more.

            "I think I'm going to go out on the town for a bit longer, but I'll drive by HQ and drop you off. You okay with that?"

            _No,_ Shaundi's conscience howled angrily, and she felt her stomach try to rebel from the turbulence her anger and confusion simmering inside her by escaping through her throat, _even for_ us _what you've been doing to yourself isn't right! Do you even know the person who's giving you those cocktails? How can you do this to yourself so soon after Johnny died without wanting anyone to know?_

            "That's fine." She lied.

The Boss adjusted his shoulders he hadn't even noticed had stiffened, and gave her an understanding nod.

            "Got it," He said, and turned to greet the Saint honking the purple Torch's horn as it neared them, "c'mon, let's go."

            "Right behind you," Shaundi called. Slowly, she slid her hands into her own pockets: feeling the texture of the diamond studs on her phone case with her right hand, and the fragile glass of the Health-Regen syringe she nicked when she dropped the box with her left. She added, a bit more softly, "I'm always behind you, Boss."


	2. Devil in the Details

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After stealing one of the mysterious remnants of the Boss's "upgrade", Shaundi is left with more questions than answers. It's getting too bizarre for one mostly-sane person to deal with: so maybe, it's time to start fighting crazy with crazy.

 

            The ride to HQ with the Boss was, in two words, painfully awkward.  
             Both of them had kept relatively quiet, guilt for two very similar but not quite the same reasons  forcefully wedging itself between them in the car. The Boss barely even hummed along to his mix tape track list that Shaundi invited him to play after she couldn't take the silence anymore - he didn't even sing along with the chorus to "What I Got"! Watching him as he drove, Shaundi silently took him in like it was the first time now that she witnessed that he was _definitely_ a different person than the one she knew in Stilwater. His face was near entirely strong angles: a good square jaw and a chin that had a dimple hidden underneath a purple beard, with frown lines etched into the sides of his mouth and scars scattered around his face, and a nose that his mom probably fawned over before it got smashed  and reset several times over. Gold eyes, slicked back hair that gave an iridescent purple-black sheen, shoulders like a linebacker (did he ever mention playing sports in college?), a bit more than not bad when it came to muscular structure, and... blue. An icy, pale blue that Shaundi furrowed her brow and mentally tried to paint tan with freckles kissing up his arms and cheeks again. How had none of them noticed before he got so clearly not _human_ colored anymore? She felt a twang of guilt at one of the possible answers: since Johnny died and they were left stranded with barely a couple grand in this sleazy city, everyone was hell-bent on doing what needing doing for revenge's sake. Did they get so wrapped up in avenging a fallen friend that they forgot to notice what was going on with the still living ones?

            "Hey, Boss."

            "Yeah?"

Shaundi faltered.

            "You... how's that bruise?"

            "Probably gone by now. Can't even feel it." the Boss replied with a cracked smile, and rolled up his tank so she could get an eyeful of his purple star tattoos, no longer standing against a bruise blue background. Shaundi frowned and bit her bottom lip briefly.

            "That's good. You better tell me if you're not feeling up to driving all the way to HQ or back from wherever you're going."

            "It was just two shots, Shaund. I'm a grown man, I promise I can get myself around town."  the gang leader retorted. Shaundi sucked her teeth and rolled her eyes, but resigned herself to buckling into the seat. She sat silently for the rest of the ride, other than giving a sharp " _no_ " when she saw the Boss's hands oh so slowly start to turn the wheel and drift towards the curb where a lone picketer held up an anti-Saints sign on the way to HQ.

            If the Boss was more affected by those weird drugs he stuffed himself with than he'd admit, then Shaundi couldn't tell considering he drove as erratically as he normally did. When they arrived at the towering building, the Boss screeched the car to a halt right up near a line of decorative shrubs. He moved to unlock the car, but stopped and instead looked over at Shaundi with concern.

            "Are _you_ gonna be all right?"

            "I'm a _grown woman_ ," Shaundi sassed back, "I'm fine.

            "C'mon, they're not _that_ shady," the Boss started to argue back, but Shaundi's cold glare made him falter before he could reprimand her for talking to her superior like that. He ran a hand inked purple with an image of his hand's bones on it through his hair and gave a low huff, adding, "look, I know what I've gotten myself into."

            _Really, Boss,_ Shaundi thought to herself grimly _, you really think you know what you're doing if you couldn't think of better excuses for having blue skin other than a bad spray tan and paint beforehand?_

            "Don't worry, really. Oh," he finally unlocked the doors, "tell Pierce and Oleg I'm staying out a bit later tonight? I'll probably be down at the Broken Shillelagh later for a few pints if they want to meet up."

            "Got it," Shaundi forced a smile onto her face, but she felt a heavy weight in her gut and her pockets. "Try not to hit any more protestors than absolutely necessary."

            "Can't give you any promises on that, love." The Boss replied with a playful grin, reaching over to crank up his tunes as Shaundi left the car.

            "Then wait 'till there's no cops next time!" The brunette desperately wanted to enjoy this moment of normalcy, of playfulness between the two of them after all the strange events on the docks, but her conscience gnawed away at her. _He's not the same. He probably hasn't been for longer than you knew._

            Stepping away from the car, Shaundi watched for but a moment as the Boss left, before turning sharply and walking inside.

            Pierce and Oleg had yet to return from their match despite the fact the sun was well beneath the horizon line, but Shaundi didn't really care at the moment. Her heels clicked sharply against the tile, and she strode straight past the other Saints, many of them not acknowledging her not out of disrespect, but because they knew that look on her face.

She had shit to do.

           

            Two weird drugs, apparently ordered through some weird app on her weirdly colored leader's phone. It was crazy. It was a puzzle Shaundi wanted to ignore her boss's not-so-subtle encouragement to leave unfinished, but she knew if she wanted to do it, she would need some help. The only way to fight crazy was with crazy, after all.

            And no one knew crazy like Kinzie Kensington.

\-----

            Despite Pierce and the Boss's teasing, Shaundi was never exactly _pissed_ they invited another girl into their clubhouse - they allowed other girls into the Saints before, even if none of them were able to scale the ladders as fast as Shaundi did - it was more of a case of envy. Shaundi fought tooth and nail with the Saints since before Steelport, and couldn't help but feel herself get a bit green over the fact that Kinzie was still essentially a newbie in her eyes but clicked with the crew like she'd known them for years within a matter of weeks. Sure she also provided them with a shit ton of helpful information and proved herself as useful as she was conspiratorial in that time, but... hey, it was _weird_ suddenly having an extra (okay, and _maybe_ a bit annoying and nutty) gal in the mix, and she and Shaundi didn't really share much in common.

            _At least she'll probably have a field day with this_ , Shaundi thought. Patting the pocket she had put the swiped syringe in, the brunette eyed Kinzie's warehouse warily. It was still cold by the docks despite it being a sunny day, but this time Shaundi brought her own purple leather jacket, leaving the Boss's black one tossed onto his bed at the penthouse. The female lieutenant barely got any sleep last night, mainly because of all the preparations she had to make. She found an old bracelet box from an ex to put the syringe in so she wouldn't have to worry about the damn needle still attached pricking her, took a picture of it and a quick drawing she made of the app's picture and sent it to Kinzie, and organized a time for them to meet in the morning considering if all the boys went out drinking last night they'd probably be passed out 'till at least noon so she wouldn't need to worry about giving them any excuses or talk to Pierce about what happened just yet. _Hopefully,_ she mused as she walked towards the garage door to the warehouse, _Kinzie will be better about keeping this on the down low than I know Pierce'd be._

"Yo, anyone home?" Shaundi called out as she entered the garage, her voice echoing off the dark walls.

            "In here!" Kinzie called out. Shaundi followed the sound of the cyber-freak's voice until the sound of someone furiously typing away on a keyboard led her to the other woman.

            "Welcome to my Inner Sanctum," Kinzie greeted, putting her laptop onto one of the tables before springing up, walking over to Shaundi excitedly, "glad you called last night. Now that you're here you gotta tell me more - is the Boss like, _really_ a vampire now, or- ?"

            "Slow down, Kinzie," Shaundi said, digging into her jacket pocket and fishing out the box for her, "he's not a vampire, still alive. He sure as hell isn't looking human, though."

            "You're telling me," Kinzie agreed, and eagerly swiped the box from Shaundi, taking off the top and ogling the used contents within, "I just thought the Boss was an alien and his human disguise was busted or something when I saw him." Kinzie paused.

            "Well, actually, he still very well may be, but we won't find that out until we can't see about getting some DNA off of this thing first."

            "Kinzie, I know what he's doing is pretty out there, but I don't think he's from _out of_ _this_ _world-_ "

            "You said he stuck himself with this, right?" The ex-agent asked, plopping back into her office chair with the opened box. Wheeling herself over to a workspace with relatively less computers than the other tables, Shaundi followed behind her, watching as the other female pulled over what appeared to be a small forensics kit.

            "Yeah, in his gut. Uh, what are you doing, exactly? I thought you left DNA stuff to the guys in the white coats when you were in the FBI."

            "I know enough to get by," Kinzie replied, snapping on a pair of latex gloves and picking up the syringe from the box, carefully inspecting it and reading over what it said on the side, "I think I'll probably just get some samples and send 'em out to some guys I know who're working in a lab not too far from here. It may take a bit longer, but if this gunk in here is really causing the Boss to get weird powers and fangs, it may be a good idea to get a full DNA profile on him and from there look for anomalies." Pushing down on the syringe, Kinzie held a cotton swab up next to the small hole in the needle and pouted when nothing came out.

            "I suppose that would've been too easy." Shaundi offered consolingly.

            "Yeah, probably," Kinzie confessed, "I'll just ask my guys to try and analyze this stuff too. Now, there is _one_ thing we talked about that I could get to, though." Judging by Kinzie's mischievous grin, Shaundi could tell she was possibly more excited about the fact she could go back to her toys than the fact the Boss might be a superhuman/alien/some other conspiracy theorist's dream catch. Wheeling her way over to her main computer, she started furiously typing away and pulling up different screens.

            "Lucky for us, the Boss still hasn't listened to my advice about ditching the phone or at least changing his password," Kinzie said, "now, once I get in it should just be a matter of trying to find where the main codes and program files are, that way, I could copy them onto here and get a more thorough look, that way once I get it on _my_ system I should be able to backtrack where that weird app was created by-"

            Shaundi was pretty clever, but Kinzie had lost her about halfway through her explanations of backtracking and how different groups would all add their different flairs to the data. Not wanting to break the mad mojo Kinzie had going on though, Shaundi just nodded her head along and scrolled through her phone.

            "-It'll be a cakewalk. Thankfully, with all these screens I can watch as we go through all his shit and- _woah, Shaundi_!"

Jerking her head up at Kinzie's tone, the tech geek hit a key on her keyboard and froze one of the screens while the others flashed .jpgs and song titles and Jane Austen eBook texts. Gawking at the screen, Shaundi felt her face redden considerably as a rather naked version of herself stared back at her, smugly grinning behind the glass screen. She'd know that photo anywhere: it was her pic inside the Church back in Stilwater.

            "Do you have something you want to share with the class?" Kinzie teased, her grin growing wider as Shaundi grew redder.

            "I swear to _fucking God_ I had no idea he had that on there!" At least Shaundi was honest. She didn't exactly like pilfering through people's things when she trusted them - it was hard enough to drag herself here about the drugs - though still: why the hell would the Boss be carrying around one of her nudes on his phone? She could think of _one_ reason, though she thoroughly balked at the concept the Boss might see her as anything but a friend or a sister. Then again, most siblings didn't carry around pics of their sisters without any clothes on... 

            "It's- it's an old picture," Shaundi stammered out an explanation over Kinzie's giggles, reaching over to try and make Kinzie switch pictures, "I fucking swear I'm gonna fucking kill him super health or _not_ \- Kinzie, take it off, will ya?"

            "All right, all right!" Kinzie cackled, defensively hugging her keyboard closer at Shaundi's assault, pressing another button. Looking back at the monitor, the picture soon switched, a few other naked women briefly flashing on the screen before the pictures became much tamer. Shaundi looked at a few pictures of a cat dressed as Johnny Gat that came after, though wouldn't be wondering until later where the hell the Boss found a cat to take those pictures with. At the moment, she was still pretty pissed that the Boss had her naked photo on his phone, and more so that she didn't know he did and what to make of it.

            "I knew it was an old pic, though, " Kinzie managed to get her giggling under control enough to offer sincerely, "I gotta say - I think your hair looks _much_ better without the dreads."

            Shaundi gave a slight smile.

            "Yeah, me too."

\-----

            It didn't take Kinzie long before she finally pinned down the main components of the Upgrade app. Giving a whoop when she found it, she eyed the small little icon like she was meeting a new friend.

            "There you are, you cute little bastard." Kinzie crowed at it eagerly. With a few more keystrokes, most all of her screens had the little icon of the white arrow with the purple circle around it, her mouse hovering right above it.

            "Can you actually get into that app now that it's in your system, Kinzie?" Shaundi asked curiously, pausing the episode of _Professor Genki's S.E.R.C_ she was streaming on her phone, she got up off the upside down milk crate she was sitting on and sauntered closer.

            "You bet I can," Kinzie said proudly, "it looks like I'll be able to access his previous purchasing records too, so we can see just how much of those drugs he's pumped into his system already."

            "You think we'd be able to trick this thing into letting us meet a dealer?" Shaundi asked. Kinzie shrugged, taking a small canister from one of the tables and opening it up, taking out two pieces of pink gum and popping them into her mouth.

            "Maybe. If the Boss was paying that sorta cash for it though and this thing is linked to his account, he'll definitely know if we tried to buy anything." Shaundi nodded, and grimaced at the thought. Yeah, it was bad enough she was helping a nutcase hack into his stuff: she really didn't want to know what would happen if he found out because she had used his cash.

            "Damn. Can we maybe trick it into thinking we're the Boss? Add a fake account to it and use that?"

            "Possibly, but that may not work depending on how deep into background checks and if there are any validation methods this thing does," Kinzie explained, "though, with most all of the Boss's stuff available for transfer onto my system, I _may_ be able to work something out. I'd need to put the fake bank account on the _real_ phone itself though too for the best form of mimicry: while not likely, there _is_ a possibility that the app may recognize there's something not right if one version of the account has two accounts, while the original on the Boss's phone just has one."

            "Is there a possibility that it'll know that you're not the Boss now because you just copied it to your computers?"

            "Pfft, nah," Kinzie snickered, "technology is good, but simple apps aren't exactly world-domination smart. Right now it basically just thinks that we've accessed the app from a new system, and considering the Boss's password security is pretty much nonexistent as long as we don't try to buy anything or add any accounts we should be golden."

            "Well, if you're certain..." Is this really where she was in her life? The star of a hit tv show, lieutenant of one of the biggest pop culturally iconic gangs of the century, now  a cohort of a super-nerd and getting anxious over opening a _phone app_? Man, if Johnny were here, he'd probably either get some sick kick out of it, or have fallen asleep with all the talk with no action.

            "I'm positive," Kinzie affirmed, "let's just see what this little Upgrade is all about!" With that, she clicked the arrow.

 

            The app had some sort of generic music playing in the background that wasn't entirely unpleasant, but it was rather redundant. The screen had crisp, clean white letters, the kind you'd see on some hotshot lawyer's business card, and a purple and black background. Now that she wasn't peeking at it with the Boss tapping through the screen so quickly, Shaundi could actually read the main list:

  *          **Abilities Upgrades**
  *          **Health Upgrades**
  *          **Damage Upgrades**
  *          **Combat Upgrades**
  *          **Vehicles Upgrades**
  *          **Gang Abilities Upgrades**
  *          **Bonuses Upgrades**



            "Vehicles?" Kinzie asked curiously. Shaundi looked over at her and shrugged.

            "I just saw the first few, the Boss was moving pretty quick about getting one of these things." The brunette explained.

            "Well, looks like not all of these upgrade things can be stuffed into your system unless the Boss is trying to become an Autobot," Kinzie commented, "You said that the Boss got something from Health, yesterday, right? Was there any others he mentioned?"

            "Yeah," Shaundi nodded, and snapped her fingers, frowning in thought, "he said he wanted that one or... Damage, I think it was."

            "Then let's check that one out first," Kinzie said with a mischievous grin, clicking on the word and bringing up a whole other list.

            While the list itself looked like any other checklist, it was what it said it provided and its implications that shook the women.

            "Holy shit..." Shaundi said under her breath, ogling the list speckled with checked boxes. Kinzie rolled over each word, each upgrade offering a small photo and brief summary of what each offered. The Boss had been rather fond of making himself damage-proof if the fact he had at least one box in each section - Bullets, Explosions, Falls, Fire, and Vehicles - checked off, but there were still a few unchecked boxes for the more expensive upgrades. Plus, a few even had little locks next to the names where the white box was supposed to go.

            "Hey Kinzie, roll over that one," Shaundi instructed, pointing to one titled "Fire - Level 4", "it has a little lock on it. What's it mean by that you need a bigger 'Respect level'?"

            "Looks like this is set up like some sorta goal system," Kinzie said, moving her mouse to circle over a number in the top right corner of the app, "looks like the Boss gains 'respect levels' somehow, and when he does, he can buy different things from Upgrade. Looks like he's pretty close to being able to get more stuff, seeing as he's already in the mid-thirties and if these other locked upgrades are any hint, this thing might just cap at 50."

            Shaundi clenched her jaw and silently nodded, counting up all the little check marks on-screen just from the Damage section. Thirteen little check marks. Thirteen needles from God-knows-where sunk into the Boss's skin, filling him with strange liquids and if they all did as told, increasingly invincible to most anything an enemy could throw at them. Part of her selfishly wanted to be happy, considering it meant the Syndicate could potentially be facing someone unstoppable by mere weapons and that it probably wouldn't be much longer before the Boss ground the remnants of the Syndicate and any signs of the rival gangs into the pavement for good. But, seeing him after the Vampire injection, knowing there was once a tan skinned, dark haired, once soft-spoken young man from Stilwater under there somewhere... or did that part of him get lost in a torrent of super-drugs after Johnny was lost in the plane?

            "Can..." Shaundi stalled, unsure if she wanted to know the answer, "can you see if he had these sorta things back in Stilwater, Kinzie?"

            "Sure can!" Sounding rather cheerful while Shaundi was tense and fighting back glassy eyes, Kinzie happily pulled up a data list on another page, digging through several rather-important looking files all marked with various wordings of "upgrade" on them until she got to something that showed an installation date.

            "... Er, or cannot," Kinzie corrected herself sheepishly, "looks like this app was installed... not long after you all started setting up camp in Steelport, actually. There's no record of it being on his phone before - at least, this one."

            "When we were talking, he made it sound like he might've done some deals with this Upgrades dealer before," Shaundi explained, "he mentioned purple hair being a side effect, but his hair was like that since he woke up from his coma in Stilwater as far as anyone can recall."

            "Maybe he did personal deals with the guy there and moved on to apps once you all decided to stick around here," Kinzie suggested, "it'd probably be easier than trying to leave for Stilwater every other time he wanted a new upgrade."

            "True..." Shaundi tilted her head and stared at their leader's level and frowned. He acted like the guy was _there_ during the deal that went down though, which didn't make sense if his dealer was supposed to still be in Stilwater. Maybe the Boss wasn't the only customer anymore... ? Ugh. That was as creepy as the thought that the Boss was secretly trying to make himself invincible by playing some creepy game with an anonymous drug dealer.

            "I don't get why it's called 'Respect Levels', either," Shaundi finally commented as Kinzie had moved back to the main screen to investigate the Vehicle section - something, Shaundi was thankful of, just promised that most of the upgrades would make the Boss's _cars_ superpowered and not himself, "he's already got the respect of the Saints, and what of the city doesn't fear him probably respects him already - just who is he trying to get the brownie points for?"

            _"For me."_

That was all the androgynous voice said before cutting to static again.

            " _Shit!_ " Shaundi swore and grabbed for her pistols, but stopped short at Kinzie's aggravated shriek.

            "How the _hell_ did they manage that?" Kinzie demanded to know, swearing vigorously as all of her monitors blinked and blurred and succumbed to white fuzz.

            "You keep here, I'm going to sweep the building and make sure the fucker isn't around!" Shaundi barked, and quickly moved away from Kinzie's Inner Sanctum. Her heels hit the stairs and the concrete hard, but Shaundi was prepared to knock that creepy fuck harder if he was around.

             It took her about fifteen minutes of looking around and her heart racing, but the warehouse was clear of any intruders. Shaundi carefully made her way back to Kinzie, only to see her gritting her teeth and cussing out the high heavens as she furiously typed away.

            "You okay, Kinzie?" Shaundi asked cautiously, only to receive the pained sound akin to a seal dying.

            "Look! Look what this fucker's doing!" Kinzie gestured to her screens, and Shaundi stared at them all and realized there was a lot more countdown timers than she recalled seeing minutes ago.

            "They're not planning to blow this place to Kingdom Come, are they?" Shaundi asked apprehensively.

            "No, _worse_ ," Kinzie wailed, "look! Upgrade is forcibly uninstalling itself and trying to delete all the Boss's info off the system! The fucker also got into a few of my major files and into part of the mainframe and the system itself and is trying to delete _that_ , too!" Shaundi nodded, looking at the timers again, and grimaced, connecting the dots.

            "So if you want to save your own stuff-"

            "- I got to let Upgrade and the Boss's go, right." Kinzie was all but baring her teeth viciously at the bug that crept into her system while she was frantically toying around, trying to save her precious documents and system files from deletion.

            "I can't _believe_ \- this thing is either connected to a live person on the other side, or someone would've had to have made that app with a virus like this in mind! Either way, it's so irrational, I just- how did my scanners not _see_ this thing? For this shitty little app to have this kind of capability, it's- this is _impossible!_ "

            "Well, sweetie," Shaundi offered, "I think a lot of 'impossible' things are going on here."


	3. Press Deals

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shaundi returns to Saints HQ, only to see all her friends have woken up and are getting worried with how... off she's been acting.   
> They totally have nothing to worry about, though. Nothing at all, nope. Definitely not the fact she's trying to unravel the Boss's secrets but still has to keep it secret from Pierce and Oleg and the other Saints for now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's Note: Oh goodness gracious, I've been pretty darn busy with school and a few other obligations, my apologies this is one is mainly dialog! The action and a bit more into the headcanons in regard to upgrades will be shortly returning, but I hope you still like this intermission-esque piece. 
> 
> Please enjoy!

 

            Not exactly the best person to help with the tech-person with tech issues, Shaundi soon went back to HQ, the purple glow of the penthouse a welcoming beacon light compared to doom and gloom of Kinzie's warehouse. She ended up spending a lot more time there than she'd anticipated: glancing to her phone, she saw it was already half past two pm by the time she was riding back up the elevator. Once she arrived to the top floor, she stepped out to see Pierce reading a _Nyte Blade_ comic on one of the couches while Oleg and the Boss watched the news on tv.

 

            "So the early bird returns." Oleg commented, and Shaundi gave him a slight wave as she headed to the kitchen.

            "Hey, Oleg," she greeted casually, "hey Pierce."

            "Yo," Pierce replied back easily, "where've you been? Never thought you were exactly the type to rise with the sun, Shaund."

            "Unlike _you_ , I had some shit to take care of." She quipped back, pulling a tightly saran-wrapped  bowl of fruit salad out of the fridge with her name scrawled across the top in Sharpie. Grabbing a fork and ripping the wrapping off, she crumpled the saran wrap and left it on the counter and stepped out into the main room again, looking for a space to join the others. Oleg moved aside on the spacious couch for her to sit between him and the Boss, but the gang leader's quirked purple brow at her lack of an initial greeting made her divert to one of the oversized purple leather chairs. Even if it had a worse viewing angle than the couch, she wasn't exactly feeling like sitting between two super-overpowered guys, even if one was a man she rolled with for years.

            Looking her up and down like her casual attire would tell him where she had gone, the Boss gave her a polite nod when she caught him staring.

            "Hey, Boss."

            "Shaundi."

            Pierce looked from the Boss and Shaundi over to Oleg, who gave Pierce the lightest heave of his shoulders in a shrug. Pierce frowned and returned back to his comic book, but didn't seem too happy about it. Shaundi knew how much it pissed him off to be kept out of the loop, and if her weird behavior was any sign...

            "Would you like to watch anything else, Shaundi?" Oleg asked the brunette, interrupting what was becoming a silent stare-off between her and the purple haired man.

            "Nah, you're good." Shaundi replied, kicking off her heels and curling herself up onto the chair. Stabbing at a strawberry blindly, she watched as Jane Valderamma popped up on the screen. It looked like she was leading some sort of debate about if the iron fist of one gang was better than being in terror of three, and she caught the Boss grinning and reaching over to nudge Oleg at the sight of a purple fluer-de-lis on the news channel followed by some footage of a few of the Saints raising hell around town. There was something charming in the Boss's excitement of seeing his army of hellions on the news: she was sure if he were more technologically competent, he'd probably save recordings of all the times someone fucked up the city so greatly it made the news like a dad saving his kid's honor roll certificates or some tacky shit like that.

            "All I'm saying, Jane, is that at _least_ our homegrown gangs had been decent enough to drive on the street for the most part," a man with a toupee not meant for live tv said, "the Saints are some of the worst drivers I've ever seen! They cause more civilian casualties driving to the grocery store than any combo of Luchador or Morning Star or Decker fights!" The Boss snickered out loud at that, and Shaundi watched as he checked his phone, the little device in his hand giving a soft 'ding' when it announced that his funds were all transferred. Recalling what Kinzie had found on his phone and knowing where that money was probably going to go, Shaundi scowled down at her brightly colored salad. If she had growled something under her breath about her thoughts on her picture or his drugs, she hadn't noticed, but the others did.

            "What was that, Shaundi?" Pierce asked.

            "Nothing." Shaundi snapped.

            "You have been seeming... unwell today," Oleg said, "is something troubling you?"

            "I skipped breakfast this morning," Shaundi explain, "I'll be fine, Oleg. Thanks, though." Even if she wasn't lying about skipping breakfast, the burden of carrying a secret was filling her up more than the fruits were.

            "Just what business were you up to so early you couldn't even get a bite to eat before leaving?" the Boss asked. Shaundi swallowed a grape down hard.

            "One of our guys told me that the Morningstar may have started doing the bulk of what little operations they still got here in the early morning, considering _some_ of us here seem to enjoy staying up late and sleeping in 'till noon," Pierce gave her a snort and loudly turned the page of his comic, though that was just the reaction Shaundi was hoping for, "I woke up early and spent the morning cruising around their old meeting places."

            "Any luck seeing anything?" the Boss asked. Shaundi shrugged and poked around her fruit salad for a piece of watermelon.

            "Nah, though I wasn't able to get everywhere I wanted either. Still, it wouldn't be surprising if they shifted their work schedules to be in opposites with ours, so I think it'd still be looking into."

            "Good point," the blue-skinned man replied. Shaundi put down her watermelon chunk when she saw the Boss look down at his phone and slowly run his tongue over his fangs, her appetite all but shot. The Boss got up and stretched, adding, "Pierce, see about getting some of the other Saints to volunteer for some early morning cruising for the week. Shaundi said it was just Morningstar, but I want to know if the Deckers or the Luchadores had similar plans. Bring in some of Zimos's girls and have 'em serve pancakes and coffee if you gotta." the Boss added, heading to his bedroom and grabbing his jacket. Shaundi looked down at her fruit salad, and willed it to somehow encourage the other gangs in Steelport to want to conveniently do some early morning dealings this week.

            "I'm heading over to Friendly Fire down in Loren Square, I know a guy there who said he could put the wrath of God in our arsenal," the Boss said, throwing on his jacket and zipping it up a little more than midway, "any of you want to come with?"

            "No." Shaundi said a bit too quickly, a bit too harshly. The three men in the room looked at her, though while Pierce and Oleg merely looked confused, the Boss looked concerned. He frowned and narrowed his gold eyes at her, and Shaundi quickly forced another strawberry half into her mouth, giving her a few seconds to think of an excuse other than she was frankly sick of hearing about any of the Boss's "guys" after recent events.

            "I think I'll just hang back and finish my lunch," she finally said, carefully evening out her tone, "I want to play with your new toys when you come back, though. Maybe we can go terrorize those protestors you hate so much."

            "I don't _hate_ them, Shaund," Shaundi felt a weight lift from her shoulders as her boss suddenly cracked a grin, "besides, I wouldn't waste bullets on 'em when there's still Syndicate bastards around I could use them on instead."

            "Yeah, right," Pierce chimed in, "you don't hate them enough to use bullets, just to scratch up the hood of your car. I'll hang with Shaundi, I wanna finish my book."

            "Fuck off Pierce, it was just a few times," which, considering the Boss's record for vehicular manslaughter, did make it seem protesters suffered at the hands of the Boss's rides a lot less than the population as a whole, "and fine. What about you, Oleg?"

            "Sure," Oleg said, "would you mind if we stopped by the Planet Saints a few blocks from here first, Boss? I got a call a few of the suits I ordered came in today."

            "No problem," the Boss said, and with that, waved goodbye to the two staying behind, heading towards the elevators, "see ya Pierce, see ya Shaundi, be back in a bit."

            "Later." Shaundi replied, looking back at the news on tv at an ad for the Let's Pretend clothing store. Pierce waved farewell and went back to the pages of his comic book.

            Pierce could only wait until the elevator rang two levels down before tossing his comic book aside, getting up, and heading straight to Shaundi.

            "Okay, so what the hell happened between you and the Boss?"

            "Nothing." Shaundi lied. Pierce snorted and gestured to the elevators.

            "Bull _shit_ nothing happened! Oleg and I aren't blind, Shaund. Don't think I didn't notice you and the Boss eyeballing each other and giving off weird vibes since you got here." Shaundi met Pierce's frown with a scowl, the lieutenants locked in a staring contest until Pierce blinked in realization.

            "Oh my god, he told you about his weird skin, didn't he?"

            " _No he d_ -" Shaundi didn't even get out her excuse before Pierce dramatically howled and slapped his knee.

            "Oh my _god!_ He _so_ told you! What'd he say it was?"

            "He told me not to tell anyone." The brunette snapped. Which was true: however, she felt rather bad about whipping out that excuse, considering part of her really _did_ just want to grab Pierce by the shoulders and tell him what the Boss has _really_ been up to. Pierce had a worse poker face she did, though, and she didn't want to risk the Boss cracking down on him and finding out she snitched against his direct orders.

            "Shit, man," Pierce pouted, "if you can't tell me directly then, can you just tell me if it was like, _super_ weird? Like moonlighting for that weird alien movie director guy, or he crashed his car into the nuclear plant or-"

            "Well fuck Pierce, his skin is blue," Shaundi retorted, "I'm sure whatever's causing it is pretty damn strange."

            "Wait, so you _don't_ know the real reason?"

            "I was trying to tell you," Shaundi chided, "but I think he gave me another bullshit excuse like he gave you." A half-truth, considering the Boss's first attempts to lie to her - it felt wholly bad lying, though. Pierce slumped his shoulders, and clicked his tongue in defeat.

            "Shit, man," Pierce said, "I was hoping if he wouldn't tell me, at least he'd tell you. I don't like him leaving us outta the loop, it ain't right when he knows we're behind him all the way."

            "You're telling me." Shaundi agreed with a sigh. Giving up on her lunch, Shaundi got back up and headed back to the kitchen, tossing the old crumpled ball of saran wrap away and digging in the cupboards for a new piece. Recalling that Pierce might have met up with the Boss last night, Shaundi glanced back at him as the well dressed man picked back up his comic and plopped onto one of the empty couches.

            "Hey Pierce, you meet up with the Boss last night?"

            "Hm? Oh yeah, we were heading back from the park and we spotted his ride outside the pub."

            "He didn't seem... different to you, did he?"

            "Not really, no," Pierce paused in thought, then added, "well... actually, he _did_ do something pretty crazy. Like, he straight up _bit_ this motherfucker during a bar fight! Ripped his neck straight open! It was nasty as _shit_ , man. I told him unless he wanted me to have Kinzie legally change his name to _Nyte Blayde_ that he shouldn't be tearin' out people's throats like that, at least not in front of me."

            "Holy shit." Shaundi said quietly.

            "'Holy shit' is right," Pierce replied, flipping through the pages of his comic book until he found the page he was on, "he nearly got us kicked outta the bar, too. Don't get me wrong, I love the Boss like a brother, but he better not be doing that again when we're rolling together."

            "You know," Shaundi asked, "how the hell can you watch that damn vampire show, read the tacky comics, and then turn around and kill a motherfucker at the drop of the hat, but the Boss biting someone in a fight squicks you out?"

            "Uh, 'cause vampires aren't real," Pierce answered plainly, "besides, it's different seeing someone do that on tv for drama with some fake blood squirtin' out, or killin' on the job when ya gotta. Just up and bitin' someone in the middle of a brawl... that ain't right, Shaund. There's gotta be _something_ wrong with you to just up and wanna do that."

 

\-----

 

            A little over an hour after Oleg and the Boss left, they returned, the Russian carrying several coat hangers with fresh-pressed suits on them and the blue-skinned boss touting two TEK Z-10s with a rather pleased grin on his face.

            "Yo, we're back!" the Boss called, receiving several greetings back from the other Saints as the crib was slowly becoming more alive with the later it got into the afternoon. Seeing Pierce had only left to get his laptop and was now toggling between checking stocks and playing some card game online, the Boss went over to him and tapped his leg with his foot.

            "Hey, you seen where Shaundi went?" He asked. Pierce looked up from his laptop and shrugged.

            "Hell if I know, man. I saw her head back to her room about an hour ago, she's probably in there," He replied, going right back to his _very_ important business. The Boss rolled his eyes, and headed off to where Shaundi usually crashed when staying at HQ. Heading right up the door, he knocked twice: well, kicked it with his foot, considering his hands were still full.

            "Shaundi, it's me, open up!" He called. He could hear her swear quietly and close something before she scrambled to the door, opening it up for him. Looking down at her, the Boss glanced her over again, noting the change in clothes - she was wearing black skinny jeans and a purple tank top covered in white fleurs-de-lis, and had a white denim jacket in hand - and how hurried she looked.

            "Yeah Boss, what's up?" She asked. The Boss offered her one of the guns, which she took and started to inspect thoroughly.

            "I came to collect on that offer to try out the new toys," the leader said, "you're not busy now, are you?" He tried to glance into her room, but saw nothing really out of the ordinary other than the fact she left her laptop on her bed.

            "Nah, I'm good," Shaundi replied, heading back into her room and putting the submachine gun onto her bed. Pulling out the drawer underneath the queen sized bed and revealing a plethora of shoes all neatly organized, she looked over all of them before plucking a pair of glossy purple heels out. Slipping them on, she asked, "you got anything in mind, or we just gonna go out and look for trouble?"

            "Knowing us, trouble will finally find its way to us, not the other way around." the Boss replied with a grin. Shaundi smiled her agreement and grabbed the TEK Z-10 off the bed as she got up. Even walking casually, the way her hips moved gave off a level of sexiness and confidence that was more than enough to make the male viewers of her show start sweating. Turning away from her and heading back to the elevators, he ran his tongue over his teeth again. Unused to the sensation of four sharper teeth and incredibly thankful he maxed out his regenerative abilities with how much more often he'd be likely to bite his tongue by mistake for the next few days.

            "Fair enough," Shaundi replied, "we rolling with anyone else, or are we just going solo?"

            "Eh, if we need anyone we'll call 'em," the Boss replied, "I don't mind just cruisin' and letting what happens happen. Maybe we'll go by and see if Zimos needs some help distributing any of his mags or has any news on where to grab some new employees."

            "We could always ask Angel if he has a few training routine for you yet." Shaundi suggested, chuckling when the Boss punched the elevator button, then punched her shoulder gently.

            "Very funny," the Boss replied, "I'd like to see you survive half the shit he puts me through."

            _Then again_ , the Boss thought, _maybe, she could..._

            Pulling up his list of apps, the Boss went to Upgrades, and tapped "Gang Abilities". It was of the only items on the list he hadn't bought much from other than weapon upgrades, though he couldn't help but just... skim it every now and then. It was wrong, he shouldn't even _think_ of bringing his crew into the shit he was doing: he had no problems playing a fucked up martyr (he _was_ sort of _the_ Patron Saint of the Saints, right? ... Right?) and just giving himself the upgrades, but...

            "Boss?"

The Boss looked up, and saw Shaundi was already in the elevator, frowning and him and holding the submachine gun at her side.

            "Coming," he said, and hurriedly stepped inside. Punching the button for the garage, he added, "any preferences on cars?"

            "Eh, I think the Peacemaker would be fun."

The Boss beamed and gave a nod of approval.

            "Good choice, love."

 

\-----

 

            It was one of the first models of cars that the Boss had made sure to hijack once he woke from his coma, and the second he got once he got to Steelport.

            "One of the real keys to getting the law to understand you're top dog," the Boss once explained to Shaundi as he was getting his newest ride freshly painted with Saints purple candy paint, "and the people to know you're _above_ the law is to take something of _theirs_ and make it so thoroughly _yours_ they can't touch it again." It was one of his favorite rides to take around town - if the fact he dropped several grand on it from the custom tires to the jet black interior to the purple sirens didn't show it - and Shaundi knew it. Watching him easily slide into the driver's side, she took shotgun, buckling up as the Boss started the car and almost immediately made sure it was on his playlist before zipping out of the garage.

            "So, just what'd you have done to these puppies?" Shaundi asked they turn on to one of the main streets, running her hands over the submachine gun and looking over at the one that the Boss nestled in the spot between them in his car.

            "Oh, not much," he replied, giving her a playful grin, "just got my hands on a few boxes of incendiary bullets s'all."

            "Shut the fuck up," Shaundi said, immediately going to inspect the clip as the Boss laughed, "you did not!"

            "Oh yes I fucking did," he gave his answer between snickers, "I figure it'll much easier to take out those fucking choppers from the ground with 'em, or at least a Brute or two."

            "Well shit Boss, let's hope so," admiring the clip and the gleaming bullets within, Shaundi loaded her gun back up, "just where'd you get this, anyways? How many cases you got?"

            "As many as we need, love," he replied easily, "I switched us over to incendiary only if these ones work out. A bit more pricey, but with how good we're doing, I doubt it'll be much of an issue with how business has been." Shaundi gave a soft whistle, impressed.

            "And here I thought you left most of the business to Pierce, Boss."

            "I can use my nice words and shake hands when I need to."

            "Mhm. I feel like seeing that would be just as impressive as seeing  what these can do to those Syndicate bastards."

            "What? You really doubt my people skills that much?" He asked, his voice playfully offended.

            "I'm just saying I think I've seen you kill more people than I've heard you say please, is all." Shaundi teased back. The Boss laughed, and Shaundi started to giggle as well, but catching sight of the Boss's fangs made her laughter die in her throat. The gang leader noticed, and cut his own laughter short. He lowered the music in the car, and Shaundi felt her stomach clench at what it meant.

            "You okay, Shaundi?"

            "Yeah, I'm good."

            "Bull _shit_ you're good," the Boss snorted, "you've been acting off since you came back to HQ this morning. If you've got a beef with me, just say it."

            _Oh, because that would go over well_, Shaundi thought bitterly, _'yeah Boss, I'm worried sick over all the crap you're doing to yourself even if I know you're gonna do it even if I'm worried, and I'm pissed I have to lie to the others about it for you', that'll go over great._ Still, she heaved a sigh, shifting through her thoughts and trying to figure out one that she wouldn't have to reference having been to Kinzie's with, Shaundi looked out the window.

            "I don't got a beef with you," no, she basically had an entire herd of damn steer with him by now, "but... Pierce told me you bit someone's throat out at the bar."

            "Oh, that?"

            "Yeah," Shaundi said. And, venturing a bit further, added, "I... I didn't tell him about that Vampire thing you took-"

            "Just call it an 'upgrade', Shaund."

            "I don't want to 'just' call it anything," Shaundi snapped back at him quickly. The Boss didn't say anything back yet, but she certainly got his attention with that: she felt the car hit the curb and sideswipe a pedestrian that didn't move out of the way in time, then felt the Boss jerk the car back onto the road. While he swore and adjusted his driving, she continued, "Boss, we got the remnants of the Syndicate and STAG on our asses and you're just- you're drinking and using these weird drugs, and I understand you think you need a break now and then, but you can't just be doing that sort of shit!"

            "What, drinking and upgrades, or taking breaks?"

            "From _tearing out throats in public,_ dumbass."

            The Boss faltered. He bit his lower lip, and Shaundi was fairly certain if he clamped down a bit too hard he'd probably start bleeding.

            "All right, I'll give you that. I guess I just drank a little too much and focused more on the fight than on the fact I was still in a bar." The way he gripped the wheel made Shaundi mildly concerned about how Pierce would fair when the Boss saw him again.

            "That's great, but I doubt that excuse is gonna save your ass when a bunch of _Nyte Blayde_ cultists start trying to get you to turn them into vampires at best if the press gets any good pics of you feasting on the blood of your victims."

            "Well, it'd certainly be a good way to get new recruits." He retorted. Shaundi reached over to punch him in the arm.

            "I'm being serious here, Boss." Shaundi scolded.          

            "Yeah, I can tell," the Boss grumbled back, rubbing the spot where she hit him, "I got it, and you're right. I should be more careful."

            "Thank you." Shaundi knew it was a lot to get him to admit anyone other than himself was right (stubborn bastard), so even if it wasn't exactly a triumph, she'd take it as a win anyhow. Reaching over after a silent minute, she gently rubbed his arm where she hit him once the Boss had returned his left hand to his left thigh. The Boss looked over at her and cracked a smile, and Shaundi smiled back.

            "You're a psycho, you know that?"  
  
The Boss laughed.

            "Yet you're still working for me."


	4. Devil in a Bottle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kinzie gets the results back from the lab, but Shaundi doubts whatever she'll tell her will be something she wants to hear. Meanwhile, the Boss makes a tough call.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Author's Note: If you're reading this, then let me say thank you for sticking with my story so far!  
> On a tad more serious note, I have included my Boss's name into the story - my apologies if you're not into that sort of thing, though I doubt I will be using it as much as I will be using just "the Boss" and other alternative titles for him. Agian though, thank you for reading, and I hope you like this latest chapter! 
> 
> Please enjoy!)

 

            Thankfully for Shaundi, while she _had_ lied about where she'd been when she went to Kinzie's, she hadn't been _wholly_ wrong. While she and the Boss had been lighting every Syndicate-tied gang member up with fiery bullets during the evening for the past several days, one of the morning crews managed to find a Decker black market tech smuggling operation, another finding a Luchador 'roid ring the day after. Shaundi was entirely sure that she had wasted several lucky stars for _that_ miracle to happen, though she hoped that she still had a few left after waking up to a text from Kinzie that Sunday morning.

            Boss's you-know-what's came in. Come to Smiling Jack's ASAP. Delete this after reading.

            "Couldn't just meet her back at the warehouse, could I?" Shaundi groaned to herself softly, sleepily stretching from underneath her covers. Taking a minute to seriously debate the pros and cons of getting out of bed and facing reality versus staying curled up in bed, the lieutenant finally forced herself out of bed and into the shower. She really hoped that Kinzie would be able to shed some light on the situation, though she was hesitant to try and do anything like hack into the Boss's phone again - and to be talking about this in a pretty _public_ place like a local diner.

            Tugging on a pair of purple skinny jeans and a coat to go over her white tube top, Shaundi put on her black heels last before heading out the door and to her garage. Stepping into her sleek Torch, she plugged her phone into the audio jack and started up her playlist before pulling out of the garage and heading into the world. Usually she'd hum and sing along, but today she couldn't bring herself to do more than strum her manicured nails along to the beat against the steering wheel. It was weird, knowing that you were going somewhere where the only thing you would hear is bad news - and weirder there was nothing she could _really_ do to prepare for it. At least she'd know that if she was going to walk into a rival gang's crib most of her problems could be solved with bullets: however, she wasn't a doctor, wasn't a tech expert, certainly wasn't a mind reader, and those were the only things that might be able to help at the moment.

            Digging her phone out of her pocket at a jingle announcing a new text, Shaundi sighed in frustration at the sight of a new text from the Boss. Pulling into a parking spot alongside the diner, Shaundi put her car in park before reading it to herself:

Morning, Shaund. We got some new leads on another Luchador operation, call me when you can so we can raise some hell.

            Shaundi smiled sadly, and texted back:

Hey, Boss. I've got a meeting with the IWSWS execs today, but I'll see what I can do.

            It was admittedly easier to lie over a text than in person, though she still couldn't help but feel the knot in her stomach cinch itself a bit tighter once she hit 'send'. Putting her phone away, she unbuckled herself and put a hand on the door. _It's for his own good,_ Shaundi told herself, _whatever he's hiding is a skeleton that doesn't need to be in his closet. It's time for some spring cleaning._

Taking a breath, she opened the door and stepped out into the morning sun.

\-----

            Smiling Jack's smelled like cigarettes, cheap coffee, and greasy hash browns. Which, not surprisingly, looked to be on most every table in the diner. The morning crowd of the place looked more dead behind the eyes than eccentric, which made the fact Kinzie was hiding under an empty table stand out more than blend in.

            "Kinzie, what the _hell_ are you doing under there?"

            "Hiding out waiting for you, duh! You alone?"

            "Well Kinzie, considering we're getting breakfast at a diner, not quite. I didn't bring anyone with me though. C'mon, get out from under there, you don't know what's been there."

            "Oh, we're not _eating_ here. I just wanted to meet here in case the Boss or his weird tech-savvy friend bugged my warehouse."

            "What? Kinzie, why would you- oh, fuck it. Kinzie, sit up, we're eating."

            "And risk getting spotted out that window? No, thanks."

            "Kinzie, if anyone tries to bother us, I'll shove my heel so far up their ass they'll be able to taste imported shoe leather, all right?"

            Kinzie thought about this for a moment.

            "Okay, fine. But you're paying."

            " _Fine_." Shaundi agreed, sliding into one of the booth seats as Kinzie wiggled out from her hiding spot, pulling out a manila folder crammed with papers from beneath the booth and putting it onto the table. Waving over a middle aged waitress with her hair in a bun and ketchup stains on her apron, Shaundi ordered a glass of water for the both of them, trading Kinzie one of the menus for the folder.

            "So, are these the results back from the lab?"

            "More than that," Kinzie said, whispering and sinking ever so slightly in her seat as she spoke. Resting her arms and head on the table as she talked, she gestured for Shaundi to open the file, adding, "I pulled a few favors-" read: probably hacked or blackmailed the shit out of someone "- and I managed to score a few of the Boss's medical records from Stilwater, and one from the hospital that one time he fucked himself over on landing out of the copter a few months ago when you guys were just establishing yourselves here. Now, if you look at the blood results on all of them, you'll find-"

            " _Kendall_?" Shaundi exclaimed, a look of surprise on her face.

            "I'm... sorry, what?"

            "His _name_ is _Kendall_." Shaundi emphasized, pointing to one of the Stilwater reports. Sure enough, "KENDALL PROFIT" was written in large letters across the top in the name category, with "the Boss, Playa" written in a section for known aliases. Kinzie looked down at the paper, then at Shaundi.

            "... Yeah, it is. I thought you already knew that." Kinzie commented.

            "Well, I knew his nickname," Shaundi muttered. Kinzie raised a doubtful brow and gave a slight smirk, and the brunette clarified, "he told me once, back at Stilwater U."

            "Ooh, didn't know you and the Boss were college buddies." Kinzie teased. Shaundi rolled her eyes and went back to the files, skimming the papers over.

            "Yeah, something like that. So, what's wrong with these? They look pretty normal."

            " _Exactly!_ So at first I thought that meant he must have started using Upgrades in Steelport," Kinzie explained, "but then I realized that in the report my lab guys sent me back, his blood still looked the same! Normal, other than a slight increase in oxygenation in the blood over time. So I looked at his actual DNA profile, and it looks like the guys found something weird."

            Pausing in their discussion to order breakfast - for Shaundi, waffles and fresh fruit, for Kinzie, a bowl of cereal - and getting right back to it after the waitress left again, Shaundi took out the Boss's DNA profile, giving a soft whistle as it stretched out from its accordion-esque folding, littered with letters and highlighter marks.

            "Looks like they found a _lot_ of things weird," Shaundi commented, "so just what are all these? DNA pieces that shouldn't be where they are?"

            "More than that," Kinzie insisted, "Shaund, if you look at the sheets beneath it, those were the analyses on the components of what was left of the goop inside the syringe. The lab guys said that they found some _crazy_ cocktail of enzymes and basically every nucleobase in there being kept from binding until they can react within a live host-" Now, Shaundi had actually done relatively well in biology, when she bothered to attend classes for it. However, the more Kinzie sped up her lowered tone in excitement, the further lost she got, "- and if you combine _that_ with the fact that most of this was swapping itself in for what is believed to be junk DNA and somehow being able to code itself into more than just whatever poor clumps of cells it can sink into-"

            "Get to the point, Kinzie."

            "He's _mutating_ himself, Shaundi!" Kinzie exclaimed. Realizing she might have raised her voice a bit above normal at the weird stare their waitress gave them while she handed each woman their breakfast, Kinzie sheepishly lowered her voice again. She poked her cereal around with her spoon, taking a small bite as Shaundi quietly stared down at her waffles.

            "Er. Sorry for yelling. But... this is- Shaundi, this is serious. Hypothetically speaking, it should also be _impossible_. All of the components of that Upgrade hypothetically could've went to the wrong parts of the DNA and given him a weird genetic disease, or have done _nothing_ , but they all went along the strands somewhere it would cause the biggest effect and caused benign mutations. I mean, my guys said a few of them looked like true random mutations, but they also said that they might just show themselves as-"

            "Strange physical side effects, right?" She asked quietly. Kinzie hesitated, but nodded.

            "Right. It's like someone took all the Syndicate's research on genetics like what they were doing with Oleg and the Brutes, but perfected it - or damn near did, anyways," Kinzie watched as Shaundi cut into the waffles with more force than necessary for a breakfast food, her eyes sharp and cold. Stirring around her cereal, she added, "the Boss is basically trying to make himself a superhero, though I'm sure this just confirms our suspicions that's what he was doing since we tried to hack into his Upgrades app."

            "Oh, he's not making himself a _hero_ ," Shaundi hissed with a dark laugh, "heroes don't mutate themselves and murder the shit out of people and _lie to their friends_." Were they friends? Shaundi liked to think he saw her as something more than a business asset as his lieutenant, that he knew she'd always be right behind him. And sure everyone was entitled to their secrets, but this... this was...

            Kinzie awkwardly ate a few more spoonfuls of cereal, watching as Shaundi poured some syrup onto her waffles, and gave one mutilated piece a powerful stab. She looked like she was going to eat it, but just dropped her fork instead.

            "Kinzie," Shaundi finally asked, "if he's mutating himself to be better than human, then how long do you think it'll take before he stops _being_ one?"

\-----

            " _Thank you for your purchase_ ," the voice sounded as placid as it did whenever it showed up, " _please enjoy."_

            The Boss walked behind the dumpster beside their air transport garage, and picked up the small cardboard box on the ground next to the walkie-talkie radio that gave a soft hum of static. Opening the box up, he took out the needle within and sighed softly, eyeing the dark green fluid within as he pulled up his shirt an felt around his side. Picking a star on his side he couldn't remember injecting into before, Kendall sank the needle into his blue skin and gently pressed down on the syringe's plunger. The final Melee Upgrade went in easy, and considering he'd left it unchecked for awhile to focus on improving his weapons and the weapons for the rest of the Saints, he still actually had a decent amount of cash left. Not enough to buy some of the higher level Upgrades he wanted, but he needed to get a few more respect levels for that too, anyhow.

            Giving a deep sigh when the syringe was emptied into his body, he leaned against the wall of the auto shop. Stuffing the used needle into the box, the gang leader tossed it into the dumpster and checked his phone, holding it in one hand so he could massage the injection site with the other. Other than the blue skin thing, had had to admit (he actually rather enjoyed his hair color, surprisingly) that for the most part, his dealer was true to his word in that he would get near unstoppable. He had joined Oleg and one of his newly established morning crews for some mayhem destroying the Deckers operation and all of their shiny new toys, and so effectively crushed them without as much as more than a few scratches on his half that even the large Russian was impressed.

            Part of him only wished that he'd had the prowess he did now a few months ago so he could have destroyed Philippe with his bare hands, which he figured would be much more satisfying than just crushing him like a bug. More of him wanted to have been as powerful as he was now years ago, back in Stilwater. He had just been a  foreign exchange student back then, too shy off of his native soil to talk much... god, maybe back then if he had the set of brass balls he did now and spoke up sooner, dominated the gang earlier, he could've _done_ more, he could've-

            Blinking, Kendall realized he had lost track of what tab in the Upgrades app he was on, as he had been thoughtlessly clicking and scrolling, only looking for locks and unchecked boxes. He had reached the Gang Abilities tab again, and had stopped on a description for the "Homie Health Increase". Frowning down at the photo of his friends next to it, he gave a snort. _It's not worth it,_ he reminded himself, _they wouldn't even believe me if I told 'em what it did, and they'd be pissed if they found out why I was doing this._

            "They're fine," he said to himself quietly, "my crew's got all the guns and all the support they'd need to help themselves. They don't need extra health, don't need extra time to hold on 'till they can get up again." The radio suddenly silenced itself, someone on the other side picking up.

            " _Johnny did_."

 

\-----

 

            Shaundi needed some air in a bad way. She doubted she could get any _clean_ air in this god-awful city, but she'd settle for relatively fresh. The lieutenant drove straight into the park, her music blaring and her windows down, her knuckles blanched white as she gripped the steering wheel.

              _You shouldn't be upset about this,_ part of her mind said, trying to rationalize the news, _he's still the Boss, now he's just different. Think about how much_ you've _changed and how everyone still likes you! The only thing he's been doing to himself has been making himself harder for those Syndicate and STAG bastards to kill! You should be happy he's trying to make it difficult for you to lose him after you've already lost so many of your other friends!_ Still, it was just one question that stood against that logic, but it was enough to make her heart sink: _At what cost_?

            Screeching the car to a halt up against the curb near the park, Shaundi stepped out and slammed the car door shut. Her heels clacked harshly against the paved concrete paths, and her look was enough to make people walking on the path to quietly part away from her like the sea away from Moses. The deeper along the path among the billowy trees and by the rippling water she got, the less urgent her steps moved. Burning down to a slow stroll, Shaundi kept silent, absorbing the strange sound mix of bird calls and car horns as she walked. In fact, it was _almost_ working to numb her to the day's discoveries until her phone started to ring.

            "Oh, for Christ's-" Shaundi growled under her breath, taking out her phone and looking at the caller ID. Oh, just Pierce. Still, poor bastard had the worst case of timing. Picking up the call, Shaundi answered with a sharp, " _what,_ Pierce?"

            "Damn girl, just what crawled up your _ass_ this morning?" Pierce snapped back. Shaundi huffed and rolled her eyes.

            "I'm busy, what do you need?"

            "I need you to get _not_ busy real quick is what I need," Pierce retorted, "get to Port Pryor ASAP! We were cracking down on a Luchador operation and we accidentally killed an undercover agent, so now we got STAG soldiers and masked assholes all over this motherfucking place! Get your ass to the 3 Count and we should be able to get 'em to step off!"

            "I'm on my way." Shaundi replied before Pierce could even finish his sentence, and she hung up. Well, so much for being able to duck away from business for the day with her figment show execs she was meeting. Turning around, she bolted back to her car, sending anyone who could move fast enough to be out of her way scattering. By the time she had thrown herself into her ride and punched the gas, her phone was ringing once again. Giving an audible "ugh", she took in a breath before answering her phone again.

            "Hey, it's Shaundi," she said to the caller, "I'm getting out of downtown now, I'll be there as soon as I can. How's it going?"

            "Oh, it's just _peachy_ ," the Boss replied sarcastically, "it's _always_ a pleasure to have STAG tanks circling my bloody casino and Brutes banging on the doors. You good on guns and getting to the party?"

            "Not sure if 'party' is the word I'd use," Shaundi answered, "but I've got enough left from our drive last night, thanks. You already there or are you heading in from elsewhere?"

            "I'm leaving the airport now, I'm taking a chopper over," the Boss explained, "I shouldn't be long getting over there. Tell the crew to fall back and hold the crib 'till I get there, from there I'll clean house and let 'em take care of the survivors. Call me if you run into any problems trying to get to the 3 Count."

            "Got it."

            "Good. Talk to you later, love."

            Hanging up after the Boss did, Shaundi tossed her phone onto the passenger seat and took out one of her pistols, holding it  in one hand while she drove with the other. _Well_ , she thought to herself, _I wanted a distraction. Guess I better be more careful with my wishes._

 

\-----

 

            By the time Shaundi rolled up onto the scene, there was a lot of green, a lot of white, a lot of purple, and many, many things broken or on fire.

            Forcefully swinging open her car door and making the Luchador rushing to rip her out of the purple Torch stumble back, Shaundi plugged three rounds into his head and throat before the masked gangster dropped dead. Tucking her pistols away, she quickly dove back into her car, snatching the TEK Z-10 she had hidden under her seat. Kicking a STAG soldier in the balls at the feel of the butt of a rifle coming down on her back as she had been getting her submachine gun, she whipped around and pulled the trigger, the man's howls in agony as flame caught in the fabric between his armor muffled by his face mask. Darting past the military man and on into the heat of the fight, she stopped to help a few fallen Saints along the way and began barking more orders the deeper in she got.

            "Everyone fall back inside, the Boss is on the way! Swing back 'round to the garage if the front door's blocked, break a window and climb in, I don't give a shit, just get moving!"

            "I think they're doing a good job at helping us break the windows, at least!" Angel called over the riotous noise. Shaundi looked over and saw him on top of one of the Brutes, the beast of a cloned man bellowing and thrashing as Angel dug his knees into the Brute's shoulders and kept his head locked between his thighs so he could get as many cheap head shots in with his glock as he could. Oleg was currently trying to beat back two other Brutes, leaving Angel free to fire until the clone beneath him dropped dead.

            "Careful, Oleg!" Shaundi called, and opened fire on one of the Brutes that rose his hands over his head behind Oleg, the sharply dressed Russian's hands interlocked with one of his mutant knockoff offspring. Circling around to get a better shot, Shaundi opened fire on the second Brute until she could feel the metal of her gun get hot in her hands, The beast howled and clawed at his back where the incendiary bullets sank into his flesh and caught the tatters of his clothes aflame.

            "Thank you, Shaundi," Oleg replied, "once we take care of these monstrosities we will be joining the others inside."

            "You better take care of them soon," Shaundi retorted over the sound of her gun as she opened fire on a Luchador truck speeding right towards her, "the Boss said he's cleaning house when he gets here!"

            The phrase appeared to spark a second breath from the Saints still battling from outdoors - and a small sense of panicky urgency, considering how fast they dragged their bloody bodies to the casino doors. The Luchadores gave whoops of falsely placed confidence as the waves of purple retreated, and the STAG members were quick to take advantage of it, shooting out the cockier Luchadores while pressing forward to box the Saints further into their crib. Shaundi could see several tanks rolling in from the highway right before a badly burned and thoroughly enraged Brute charged her.

            With a well placed sweep of his beefy arms, Shaundi was sent flying, hitting the hood of a long since abandoned Saints backup vehicle with a yelp. Angel was on the burnt Brute almost immediately, giving a holler as he kicked out the brute's knees and drove several bullets into his skull.

            " _Shit_." Shaundi hissed through gritted teeth, rolling off the hood with a pained moan and several other swears. She swore she felt her ribs crack when she tried to move - ugh, today was just _not_ her day. But if it wasn't going to be _her_ day, she could sure as hell guarantee it wasn't going to be anyone _else's_ , either. Hastily reloading her submachine gun, the lieutenant gunned down a masked bastard with a grenade launcher that just hopped out of one of the tacky green cars, pressing forward and aiming a few shots at the goons that came with him for good measure. After all, it was rather hard to focus on, you know, not being on fire, even while a pissed off brunette was running over and stealing your dead friend's grenade launcher. Walking backwards as she fired, Shaundi scattered rained grenades down by the vehicle, many exploding earlier than they normally would thanks to the fiery heat of the flailing Luchadores near them. Wincing at the heat and the feel of bloody debris fly around her, Shaundi turned her attention to the creaking of tanks as they chugged closer. She barely got out a handful of grenades under their treads before she heard the ominous sound of a helicopter whirring above. Looking up and seeing a purple chopper, Shaundi gave a relieved grin and turned to the other Saints.

            "Boss is here!" She yelled. What few of them were still out perked up and hurriedly tried to fend off the STAG and Luchadores on their tails. Shaundi dropped the grenade launcher and moved as quickly as she could with a very sore back, moving to help pick up a fallen blonde Saint bleeding on the ground with her friend. The Boss pressed a few buttons in the copter, and a very soft sound of a turret gun powering up sounded from above.

            "Boss is cleaning house!" Oleg barked over the sounds of confusion from the rival gang and the soldiers. Shoving over the bent corpse of a Brute, he charged for the door, scooping up Angel as the ex-masked wrestler clawed at Luchador's mask as well as any other purple-clad bodies he could before running into the casino. Following in shortly behind him, Shaundi kept her back to the door and walked backwards inside, sending sweeping waves of bullets outwards to fend off anyone who wanted to follow in after them.

            "I'll seal the doors with Oleg, everyone else get to the penthouse, Boss is cleaning house outside!" Shaundi ordered the stragglers in the casino. They hobbled along obediently, Oleg moving over to Shaundi to help her close the doors. Shaundi locked the doors, and Oleg picked up a few of the slot machines and piled them in front of the door to keep whatever was pounding on the doors outside away from them. Shaundi heard the low shriek of a VTOL fighter plane hovering in the air, but by the time she looked outside, the drumming of bullets and missiles whistling out of the copter took over the symphony of destruction outdoors. Running with Oleg to the elevator, by the time they got to the penthouse to help distribute the sniper rifles and RPGs, the VTOL was nothing but a metal carcass, what was once the cockpit nestled snugly in the remnants of the tank it crashed into.

 

\-----

 

            It didn't take very long before the Luchadores and STAG crews  realized that "cleaning house" was a Saint colloquialism for "obliterating any and everything causing a hassle to such a complete and total nothingness that it would trouble them no longer". What the Boss didn't send to meet their maker with missiles and a rain of bullets, the Saints from the safety of the penthouse destroyed with their rocket propelled grenades and bullets from sniper rifles. By the time the Boss parked his chopper onto the helicopter pad, what few members of both law enforcement and rival gangs alike that could still move teetered away from the scene of the crime in what few cars they had remaining or into the alleys pocked between buildings.

            "Anything else for ya, sunshines?" Kendall called down to the retreating backs of his would-be foes from the safety of the helipad, a RPG launcher slung over his shoulder in casual threat. Laughing and casually flipping the carnage beneath him the bird, he headed inside. Gesturing for the Saints within to give it up, those that weren't too badly bloodied managed to give a few cheers and applause to their leader as he stepped inside. Placing his weapon down to join a growing pile of other launchers the others used, he gave a few people as he went by high fives and pats on the back. He was grinning, but Shaundi knew he was doing more than flaunting his cocky swagger that all but rolled off of him: his gold eyes were scanning each body for blood and broken bones, seeking all the chinks in his gang's armor that managed to be penetrated. He might have been the Boss now, but he was once a foot soldier like them not so long ago he couldn't remember, after all. Once he got through a brief survey of the damage done, the blue-skinned man pulled himself away from the crowd and stepped up onto one of the couches. Whistling to gain everyone's attention, he paused for dramatic effect and glanced back outside through the large windows. Shaundi noted that he had picked up a pair of black devilish horns sometime today - at least, secretly wished they were actually _bought_ and not grown.

            "Well," the Boss began, gesturing back to the windows outside, "I'd say it looks pretty damn clean out there, eh?" He cracked a fanged grin at the chorus of snickers and hollers of agreement.

            "Now, I think we've all earned ourselves some hard liquor and down time, what say you?" Another, more lively chorus roused, and the Boss laughed and clapped his hands together before gesturing for everyone to go about their business.

            "Then get going, then! Pierce, call that one shop in Loren Park I like, you're on pizza duty."

            "The fuck man," Pierce whined, slumping his shoulders, "you know I hate pizza duty!"

            "And I'm sure my other lieutenant and our boys hated getting the shit blown outta them because _they_ were fighting outside." the Boss retorted. Stepping down from the couch, he gave Oleg and Angel high fives and Pierce a friendly pat on the back at his pouting expression, but held back from giving Shaundi a high-five just yet.

            "A few of our guys got busted up pretty bad, I'm gonna call the hospital and see if they can't hook us up with anyone or if we have to send 'em all there. You all right, love?"

            "Got smacked around by a Brute and had one of those STAG fuckers hit my back pretty hard, but I think I'll be fine." Shaundi replied. The Boss frowned and gestured for her to turn around. Huffing at his display of concern, Shaundi turned around and shirked off her jacket, revealing part of her back where her tube top had hiked up a bit. Frowning, the Boss moved closer, and Shaundi tensed at the sudden sensation of warm knuckles brushing against her bare lower back as her boss started to lift up her shirt.

            "What the _hell_ are you doing?" She hissed, quickly grabbing the front of her shirt and tugging it down so he couldn't pull the back of her tube top higher. He responded in a low whistle, not pulling any more at her wish, but he could see enough of the mottled blue and black on her back to know it probably crept up to regions unseen.

            "They got you good, Shaund," he commented. She felt a few curious fingers gently press into her skin, and she winced at the contact. His brow furrowed at her reaction and he added, "you gonna be all right with your show and all that looking like this?" Her show? Why would- oh, right.

            "Eh, they can do miracles with makeup," she replied, awkwardly reaching behind her to tug down her shut as Ken pulled his hands away, "I'll be fine, I've been through worse shit." The Boss forced a small smile onto his face at that.

            "I suppose I couldn't interest you in any painkillers the nice men in white coats may give me, then?"

            "I said I was fine, not that this didn't hurt like a bitch." Shaundi retorted, picking up her jacket as she spoke. The gang leader grinned and chuckled at her.

            "I'll see what I can do for you." he snickered. Patting her shoulder affectionately once she tugged her jacket back on, the blue skinned man left Shaundi to head downstairs to the lobby. Watching his broad back as he left, Shaundi caught herself staring for longer than what was socially acceptable and shook her head. Walking over to the nearest chair not being occupied by another injured Saint, the lieutenant sunk down into the chair, and watched Pierce as he tried to corral votes for what toppings should be on the pizzas.

 

\-----

 

            "It's for their own good." The Boss said the words aloud to himself, trying to convince himself that he knew this was the right thing to do. The elevator sank down to the ground floor slowly, and the Krhyme station played quietly. The ambulance would be arriving any minute, but now...

            The blue-skinned boss hesitated, then swallowed hard, steeling up as he pressed the button. Even if he knew it would be for the benefit of all the Saints, his first thought was _"_ I'm sorry _"_ when the order for the upgrade was processed. The elevator dinged, signaling he was on the first floor. The radio cut out.

            " _Thank you for your purchase_ ," the dealer's voice chimed, " _you know what to do._ _Please enjoy_."


	5. Deal Me In

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shaundi reflects on old memories, and her and Kinzie's efforts to uncover the truth about the Boss's Upgrades and the dealer are joined by another Saint.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's Note: Hello there, everyone!  
> My apologies for taking so long to get this one out, I've had a rather tough week or so between a few unfortunate family issues (one of my pets died, among other things), and school. Once April is over though, I should be able to post more frequently, as my semester will have ended. Thank you all again for reading, and for understanding! 
> 
> Please enjoy!

 

 

            _"What cha workin' on, Boss?"_

_"_ Christ _, Shaundi," the Boss hurriedly slammed his laptop shut, and started shoving all of the papers and books filled with post-its into drawers and under weapons and maps, "how many times have I told you to knock if my door's closed?"_

_"I knocked like five times, man, you just weren't listening." a lazy grin crept onto her face as she spoke, and she sauntered towards the Boss as he went back to his item shifting. Twirling a dread around one of her fingers, she eyeballed the rearrangements being made, setting a hand on the tan man's shoulder as she did. For a guy everyone thought had his ass delivered extra crispy to the pearly gates, she noted, his skin was actually pretty smooth._

_"Still didn't answer my question, Boss. You working on some secret project?"_

_"Yeah, something like that," he answered quickly, "you got news for me?"_

_"I do," Shaundi replied. Her hand crept across his shoulders, and she gave a playful laugh when his broad back hunched at its journey to his other shoulder, "and_ you _got an answer you don't wanna share. C'mon, lighten up. You embarrassed by trying to be book smart instead of just street smart or something?"_

_"What do you mean 'trying' to?" the Boss huffed under his breath. Shaundi gave another laugh, her wrists jangling as she gave his shoulder a light squeeze. Leaning over, she watched the freckles on his face pop out against the red on his cheeks as his eyes wandered from his desk to her busty figure, betraying him long enough Shaundi could swipe one of the thick papers off the desk. Grinning broadly and stepping back as the Boss scrambled out of his seat, Shaundi quickly read over the title of the paper._

_"'Modern Branding and the Shift in the Worth and Perception of the Body'? You write this, Boss?"_

_"Give it back,_ now." _He lunged for her. Shaundi laughed him off, moving deceptively fast for living in a constant daze of smoke, folding the paper over once and jamming it into her cleavage as she dodged him. Whipping around, the Boss reached out to snatch his paper back, only to let his arm fall back limply at the sight of where it was being held hostage._

_"Shaundi, quick fuckin' around! Give that back and tell me what you're here for!"_

_"I'm taking that as a yes," Shaundi teased, "and I was just gonna say that I got some intel that there's gonna be some sort of frat bash week going down at the university at the end of the month and that it may be a good idea to get some of your boys to play vendors for any events they got going down." The Boss's shoulders slumped slightly, and he looked Shaundi right in her glazed gaze._

_"Really, that was it?"  
            "What, would you rather have _ not _known and let the Sons of Samedi run the show there instead?"_

_"Hell no." the Boss replied with a scoff. He took two steps closer, and Shaundi took a half-step back. He glanced back down at her chest, and reddened further as the stoner cockily puffed her chest out for him, daring him to go over and pluck his paper out from between her breasts._

_"I'll get a few guys on it, see if we can't cut some deals with Freckle Bitch's or Apollo's to get our guys and our product into their tents if they're going to be having vendors. I'm trying to work on something that needs to be done by tomorrow_ now _, so could you give me back that essay and we drop this?"_

_"Aw, and just pretend like I don't know the big bad Boss is a nerd now?"_

_"I am not a nerd, but yes, now give it."_

_Shaundi tilted her head and gave a thoughtful hum, sizing up the freckled man. Sure, his scowl was pretty mean at the moment, but it was hard to take him seriously when he was turning more red than tan and wearing nothing but mismatching plaid pajama pants and a faded gold and purple muscle tank._

_"I'll trade ya." She finally offered._

_"I don't have any light bulbs not being used if that's what you want." He growled back. Shaundi laughed him off._

_"Please, I got plenty back at my usual crib," she teased, "I'll give this back and let you go back to your nerd shit if you tell me your name."_

_"My... name?"_

_"Mhmmm," Shaundi purred, "don't worry, I won't tell all the others if it's something dorky like Wilfred or Theodore."_

_"It ain't, but I'm still not gonna tell you."_

_"Then_ I'm _not going to give this back to you." She teased. She pressed down on the folded paper, and sank it deeper into her cleavage until she felt it hitting the wire of her bra. The Boss sank his shoulders lower and rolled his eyes. She was probably high, he convinced himself, and wouldn't remember anyways - it was more the fact he had to swallow his pride to get it back that made this difficult, considering he didn't want to risk damaging his document by yanking it out from its raunchy spot._

_"It's Ken, all right?"_

_Shaundi blinked, and kept quiet. The Boss sighed and rubbed the back of his neck, suddenly looking very interested in the dirty poem made by the word magnets on his fridge left there by other visiting Saints._

_"_ Ken? _You mean like Barbie's boyfriend?"  she finally asked._

_"No, as in Ken Profit," the Boss replied. Shaundi laughed, and he pressed on, "there, now you know, now cough it up." Shaundi's laughter faded to a soft giggle, and she sashayed closer, slowly pulling out his folded essay from between her breasts. She held it out and Ken took it with a grumpy look on his face, flipping through it. It smelled like cheap perfume and pricey weed._

_"Ken Profit? Y'know, with a last name like that Ken ain't all that bad," Shaundi mused, "you could probably pull something like Johnny and just be called 'Gat' by the others-"_

_"_ Or, _I could just keep being called Boss, which is exactly what I plan on doing," he shot back. Shaundi moved out of his way as he went back to his desk and sat down. Her smile faded as he smoothed his paper down, and she stepped back over to the Boss as he started pulling all of his books and papers back from where he had banished them, opening up his laptop once again to reveal the report in progress he had been working on. He added in a more levelheaded tone, "I'll get on business once I'm done with this. Get Pierce to go ahead and start trying to get into contact with any businesses who might be part of the week if he's not busy, and some of the newer Saints to go do some recon and get more info on the frats and what events in it the Sons of Samedi might be trying to get in on."_

_"Got it," Shaundi said. There was a heavy pause that followed, broken apart only by the sounds of Ken setting up his study area and Shaundi sighing heavily. Digging into her pockets, she took out a small case and her lighter, taking out a neatly rolled blunt from the case as she spoke, "you want one, Ken? You really need to unwind some."_

_"Maybe when I'm not trying to write something," he replied, "and don't call me that."_

_"Aw, okay Mister Profit." the Boss made such a face at that when he turned around in his chair to look at her that Shaundi couldn't help but snicker as she lit her joint._

_"'Mister Profit' was my old man, Shaund," he corrected, surprising Shaundi with her own nickname, "just leave it at Boss, all right?"_

_"Bo-ring, but if it'll make you happy," Shaundi pouted. She took a drag from her joint, but the Boss didn't turn around to try and get back to work just yet. Exhaling the smoke, she asked, "just so you know though, I'm totally still gonna call you Ken - like, not when we're in front of the crew or anything, but at least when it's just us." The Boss raised a brow, and Shaundi took another hit._

_"That can't be healthy just goin' by your job title all the time, ya know? Like, you're more than just the guy who runs the Saints, man."_

_"Oh, now_ that's _debatable," the Boss snorted. Shaundi was barely buzzed but even if she was totally high she would've been able to see the sad look in those heavily gold flecked eyes - more gold flecked with brown, really - and how crooked his smile appeared. At her silence, he added, "you know, when you're in a coma, you can hear things. Don't remember everything said, but... recall the gist of it. All that time I was out, not a damn person called me by my name. I heard my prison number, I heard 'Boss of the 3rd Street Saints', shit I remember hearing 'bastard' and 'motherfucker' for obvious reasons, but... never my real name. I probably wouldn't have ever remembered it myself if I hadn't nicked my medical records before breaking out I hadn't heard it in so damn long." Shaundi frowned, taking a longer drag than she had intended as she listened._

_"You bothered to remember, though." She finally said. The Boss looked at her past the smoke cloud drifting from her lips, and straightened out his smile a little more. Shaundi smiled back at him easily, and started heading for the door._

_"And I'm going to remember, too." Shaundi teased. Ken gave a snort of a laugh, and turned back to his work._

_"Whatever you say, Shaund. Don't you think it'd be weird that you'd be the only person calling me that, though?"_

_"Eh, only as weird as you want to make it."_

 

\-----

 

            "Bastard," Shaundi muttered to herself, "didn't even tell me his full name."

            It was three days since she helped the Boss clean house at the casino, and the bottle of pills her blue-skinned Boss offered her that day was nearly empty. They did what they promised to do though, the pain in her back almost completely wiped away since she started taking them with breakfast and dinner. Her back was healing nicely as well - a bit faster than she expected even, given, the size of the bruise. The rest of the crew was also in various stages of repair, but on the whole things were soon going back to normal as if they hadn't staged an incredible stand against two rival groups swarming outside one of their strongholds.

            Shaundi fiddled with the bottle in her hands, letting her thoughts drift in and out of memories past. Shit, she had totally forgotten about that, but then again with how stoned she constantly was back then, it wasn't exactly a big surprise. She felt a little bad about not having kept her word on calling him by his name more, though she had a sneaking suspicion that was just how he liked it. The lieutenant pondered the possibility of trying to pick it up again, getting out of bed and cracking open the bottle.

            "Ken Profit." Shaundi said it softly to herself, and made a face down at the two pills still left in her bottle. It sounded so foreign from her lips, felt so bizarre on her tongue. Frowning, she took her bottle out into the kitchen and waved lazily at the other Saints milling around the main part of the penthouse. _Could always just hold it over his head_ , Shaundi thought to herself, _or maybe just auction the info off to the highest bidder in the crew next time he pisses me off. I'm sure Pierce would pay decently and spread it like wildfire._ She smiled to herself about that, imagining what the Boss's face would look like if he walked into HQ to everyone calling him by his first name. Not exactly a commonplace way to exact revenge, but the Boss wasn't exactly a commonplace sort of man.

            Drinking down the last two pills with a tall glass of ice water, Shaundi dug out an unmarked Chinese take-out box from the fridge (people rarely ever felt like cooking after big brawls, so the local food places could usually expect a good week of business) and put it into the microwave. Punching in two minutes into the microwave timer and hitting go, Shaundi stifled a yawn and skimmed through her emails. She maybe got two bites into her pilfered teriyaki chicken lo mein and three sentences into her reply to a business email regarding the new _I Wanna Sleep With Shaundi_ promo posters when her phone buzzed to life. Raising a brow, Shaundi saw the caller ID and finished chewing a piece of chicken before answering.

            "Hey, Kinzie, what's up?"

            "Hey Shaundi, not much," Kinzie replied, "listen, I got an idea about You-Know-Who that may help us find out more about his You-Know-What's." Shaundi stopped twirling the saucy noodles around her fork.

            "Wait, wh- Kinzie, I thought we already knew about his-"

            "I mean his _other_ You-Know-What's! The ones that can help us find out about how he got those _those_ You-Know-What's!" Shaundi rolled her eyes.

            "I suppose you can't just tell me straight while we're on the phone, can you?"

            "Oh, because I'd _totally_ risk him finding out before we started doing more planning that may or may not have to do with his tech - look, just get over here when you can, okay?"

            "Okay, I'll see you in a bit." Hanging up, Shaundi set down her cell phone on the counter, and stared down into the carton.

            "Well, fuck _."_

\-----

            After finishing her dinner and hurriedly wrapping up her email, Shaundi was on the move. She cruised down to the docks while the sun slid down the horizon, shining an orange light on the underbellies of the looming purple clouds and inking what of the sky wasn't taken over by the approaching storm a coral pink. Pulling her car into the parking lot near the warehouse, Shaundi was surprised to see that Kinzie's garage door was left half-open.

            "Oh, _shit_." Shaundi hissed to herself, and quickly - but as quietly as her heels on concrete would permit - headed inside. Stalking straight to Kinzie's Inner Sanctum, she peered around the corner of the room, only to give herself away with an aggravated sigh.

            "You've _got_ to be fucking kidding me."

            "It's nice to know my help will be appreciated, Shaundi." Oleg replied coolly, nodding to her politely from his seat as Shaundi stepped into the room, glaring daggers at Kinzie. The tech expert frowned back at the brunette, sliding her chair ever so slightly closer to both Oleg and her main computer station.

            "You know I didn't mean it like that, Oleg- well, actually, I did mean it like that. Kinzie, what part of 'under wraps' have you not gotten about this whole thing?"

            "Well it's not as though I leaked his records to the whole damn _gang_ ," Kinzie retorted, "and if we want to learn much else about this mysterious weirdo dealing bio-altering drugs to the Boss, we're gonna need help. And trust me, Oleg is going to be a good guy to bring onto the team, especially with his... er, experience with that sorta thing, for lack of a better phrase."

            "It's all right, Kinzie," the Russian reassured her, "though I must clarify that I was never quite in our boss's position, as I was mainly kept to be replicated, not to be tampered with." Shaundi scowled, and crossed her arms over her chest. Kinzie had a point; Oleg was a good guy from what she knew, even if she mainly only ever saw him with Pierce or the Boss. Still, he wasn't exactly as familiar as she was with the Boss (and neither was Kinzie, really, but she was sort of considered a last-resort anyhow) and it felt so... not right to be letting the word spread.

            "So, now that I know we're making a Boss-busting crew," Shaundi commented, shooting a rather pointed look to Kinzie, "should I assume you also took the liberties of telling him what the hell's been going on with the Boss already, Kinzie?"

            "Well, just the basics," Kinzie huffed back. Oleg reached over and offered her a consoling pat on her knee before she added, "you know, that he's been dealing in some weird drugs and mutating himself, but I thought it might be better for you to tell him about how you found out and all. Maybe it'd help with what we have planned." Oh, great, so he knew the worst of it already, it seems - still, Shaundi's blood was at a steady simmer right now at the fact Kinzie not only had the audacity to ask another Saint for help behind her back, but to straight up tell him some of the damning secrets they were unearthing without her approval.

            "I asked the Boss about his skin, he lied and said it was paint and I called bullshit," Shaundi finally began to explain with a sigh, sitting herself on one of the stacks of documents piled high from the ground, "so he took me out onto the docks a bit further out from here and told me to pick one of the Upgrade items from his phone, but ended up getting himself some weird one about Health. Some asshole then speaks up and says they got the Boss an extra gift with their purchase and peaced out, and it turned out that the voice was just coming from a two-way radio placed next to a little box. Then the Boss stuck himself with the needles, and... yeah, that's about it.

             I tossed one of the needles out into the ocean because he told me to," Shaundi added, "and I probably would've chucked the Health one too if I weren't so damn concerned about what the Hell he's been doing to himself. He told me to just try and forget and keep it on the down low, after all." Another well placed pointed stare at Kinzie was soon interrupted by Oleg.

            "If you don't mind me asking," Oleg asked, "the Boss has probably informed you to keep many other illegal items he's done secrets before: what is it about this one that has you so riled up?" Shaundi bristled, though the giant had a point: as far as crimes, at least this one technically only effected himself. Was she just being selfish, delving into his personal life for his sake without him even wanting her to because she thought she knew better? Shaundi made to speak, but faltered, looking down at her phone.

            "I..." she began. She traced the password onto her phone thoughtlessly, and stared blankly at the floral background on her phone. "I just don't think what he's doing is right. Shit, I know he hasn't done something 'good' in years, but he's not even _human_ colored anymore and he expects me not to worry about it. And when I saw him put that Vampire serum in and buckle over, I just... there's no way that what he's doing is safe. We already lost Johnny, and I know if the Saints lost the Boss again, it'd be... it'd-"

            "You know," Oleg interjected delicately, "there is nothing wrong with just admitting you care for the Boss and you're worried." Shaundi whipped her head up to look at him, and frowned at the slow, understanding smile that crept onto the Russian's face as red crept onto her cheeks. Kinzie gave a soft, childish " _ooohhh_ ", which caused Shaundi to turn her attention to the other woman.

            "Not like _that_ , asshole," she hissed, "but yeah, that's what it boils down to, doesn't it?" Oleg nodded his approval, and gently nudged Kinzie closer to her computers. Kinzie got the message, and other than her obnoxiously coy smirk, got to pulling up something on her computer monitors.

            "I think all of us are concerned for him as well," Oleg offered, "and that is why I want to help. Do not worry, I will not be spilling any of the secrets discussed here, which is presumably also why you have not informed Pierce already of this knowledge." Shaundi gave a sheepish nod of her head in agreement. Poor Pierce, she knew how much he hated being kept out of the loop, and while usually she liked teasing him about it, in regards to the current topic she felt kinda bad about it. He's known the Boss as long as she did after all, and even if they all had their disagreements and teased each other Pierce was one of the closest things she had left to family that gave a damn about her. Still, there was no way in hell she'd be risking Pierce accidentally leaking their still-formulating plans to the Boss: no way, not yet, not when they weren't even fully made.

            "Good," Shaundi approved, "so, when Kinzie called, she said she might have an idea?" Oleg nodded.

            "We do," he explained, "but it will be risky. You both discussed it briefly when exploring the Upgrade app before, and I believe we may actually have a chance to attempt it, given a good plan. You remember discussing the possibility of meeting the dealer, yes?"

            "Yeah, Kinzie said if we did anything from here it might notify the Boss."

            "But if we went onto their phone, it may not," Oleg added with a confirming nod, "if we obtain possession of his phone for a little while, Kinzie may be able to manually put in a false additional account or directly transfer information to her computer. If she does that, it may reduce the risks of the app catching us again long enough that we can deduce at least what all the other Upgrades do or possibly even be able to predict where they meet the Boss to deliver the Upgrades."

            "All right, sounds good," Shaundi agreed, "other than the fact that it'd involve us somehow getting the Boss's phone, which he basically has attached to his hip at all times. How would we get it?" Kinzie and Oleg both looked at her, and Shaundi felt the Chinese food in her stomach churn.

            "Ohhh no. No no no," the lieutenant gave a laugh of disbelief, "you're not putting that on me. This is _your_ idea."

            "It is," Oleg pointed out, "but you are the closest of us to him, plus it would be less risky if you did it than if he found out either of us were in on it."

            "Unless you want us bringing Viola into this to seduce his pants off or Angel to wrestle it from his grip, it's pretty much on you," Kinzie added, "we did our part in making the plan, didn't we? We'll also do the transferring parts. It shouldn't take more than ten minutes tops when you get it, the worst part would just be figuring out how to get it back to him." Gripping her phone tightly, Shaundi clenched her jaw and looked from Kinzie to Oleg to the screens, where various programs looked like they were booting up. She made to give in, offering a defeated sigh, but a voice echoed from the other room that made her blood run cold.

            "Just who are we getting back at, now?" the Boss asked, his footsteps nearing as Kinzie and Shaundi exchanged panicked stares, the brunette furiously gesturing to Kinzie's monitors as Kinzie whispered a rushed "I _know_ " and started typing furiously.

            "Oh, hello Boss," Oleg greeted, looking over at the blue skinned man as he stepped into Kinzie's Inner Sanctum, "what's up?"

            "Not much," Ken replied easily, setting down a box of Mexican food on one of Kinzie's desks, "hey, Kinzie, got you some chow while I was out. I got you some too, Shaund, though I was expecting to be getting it to you a bit later." Shaundi rolled her eyes at his deviously accusatory grin, knowing better than thinking it was all playfulness in that smile. She wouldn't just show up to Kinzie's place unprovoked, after all, and for once Shaundi cursed her lack of sisterly bonds with the other woman as they would be _really_ convenient right about now.

            "Thanks, Boss," Kinzie replied, rolling her chair over to the box and opening it up. She picked up one of the boxes inside and opened it up, giving a little delighted noise at the sight of the gooey nachos within, adding, "ooh, looks good! These from that Mexican place in Yearwood?"

            "They are," he confirmed, "now, what was this about getting back? What's the problem?" Kinzie conveniently stuffed a chip into her mouth. Oleg and Shaundi exchanged glances, and Shaundi finally spoke.

            "Well, with the Deckers having so much of their shit online," she forced out, "I was figuring that they might have some hand in online- uh, online gambling rings."

            "Online gambling," the Boss asked, looking at Shaundi with some confusion, "you mean like those online slot games you see grannies playing?"

            "Grannies may be playing them," Oleg said, "but they may also be able to bet very real amounts of money online, at least put them into the games. Should the Deckers have their hands in any of these rings, they could still be generating large amounts of cash for themselves - and stealing it from us from the Three Count." In that moment, Shaundi could have probably given the large man a high five in how easily he slid into her lie. The gang leader's slight clench in his square jaw was enough to let Shaundi know he was buying into it, at the thought of those Decker dorks possibly stealing _his_ things.

            "All right, and if they are, then what can we do about it?"

            "I figured Kinzie here might be able to figure out a way to determine if they were doing any online gambling schemes," Shaundi explained, "and then do... I dunno, some sorta nerd shit to stop it." The Boss nodded, and looked over to Kinzie, who was still filling her face with nacho cheese dripping chips.

            "And do you know any nerd shit that could stop 'em, love?"

            "Well, _maybe_ ," Kinzie finally said after she swallowed her food, "I only just got the request to do this like ten minutes ago though. If they _do_ have anything online though, you bet I'll find 'em. And from there, I may be able to make an unstoppable algorithm and put it up against their games and take them to the cleaners, or maybe just find a way into their accounts where all the gambling cash the house sites earn goes, or-"

            "So if it exists, destroying it is doable?"

            "Of course." Kinzie grinned. The Boss nodded his approval, and picked up his large box of food.

            "Good. Be sure to keep me posted. Good thinking, Shaundi."

            "Thanks." Shaundi replied, smiling more at the fact that her lie went over better than she hoped. Oleg gently nudged her, and Shaundi glanced over at the massive man before looking back at the Boss, watching as he checked his phone. Summing up her courage, she spoke up.

            "Hey Boss, after you go deliver that, you wanna go out on the town?" Ken blinked, and tilted his head at her.

            "Sure, love. You got anything in mind?" Shaundi got up from her seat, and looked down at her phone to ignore Kinzie and Oleg staring at her back.

            "Oh, not really. I can think of a few places we could swing by, though. I just figured it'd be a nice night to go out, especially since the new season of IWSWS is going to be starting soon." The Boss laughed, but moved so she could get past him before following after her.

            "Well, I don't know about _nice,_ but I'm always down for going out. See ya Oleg, later Kinzie."

            "Bye!" Kinzie called. Oleg waved to their retreating figures before swiping one of Kinzie's nachoes.

            "Have a good evening, you two!" He called. Shaundi couldn't help but feel like there was an unsaid " _good luck_ " in that statement. Walking out to their cars, Shaundi headed to her car while Ken went to his, the purple Peacemaker parked right alongside her Torch. She caught a glimpse of several bags labeled with cacti dancing in sombreros in the passenger side of his car as he opened his door, a sight oddly relieving as it meant she'd probably have a bit more time to think about what the hell they were going to do and what she could do to get his phone from him during that time in such a way that she could have it back to him before he even noticed. _I could always just ask him more details about this,_ she thought to herself before giving a quiet sigh, _though I somehow doubt that would work out well. At least this way as long as he doesn't know, it shouldn't hurt him._

            "Well shit, Shaundi," the Boss commented, whistling at the sound of thunder rolling above them, "so much for a 'nice night', eh?" Shaundi swore, and opened up her car door.

            "So it seems. You want to just hang out at HQ for tonight then and do something tomorrow?"

            "Eh, the rain doesn't bother me much," he answered with a shrug, "I figured it'd ruin your hair or whatever." Shaundi gave a scoff and slid into her car.

            "Oh please, I'm not going to melt," she retorted, "besides, I got some spray for that back at HQ and my place. It won't really matter if we just go to the clubs downtown anyhow, seeing as most all of them are indoors."

            "Fair enough," he replied, "so, we head to HQ, get ready, and go out and see what kind of trouble we can get into from there?" Shaundi exchanged mischievous grins with him.

            "Deal."

           


End file.
